Guys, I need help.
My chest and neck have been increasingly trying to expel something for the past 2 weeks.
My body has been doing what I call ‘automatic breathing’ when I meditate for about a year now, getting to it increasingly faster (basically I just need to chill and it starts), but now, even throughout the day, it feels like it’s trying to make room and push something out. Same with my abdomen. Unfortunately I haven’t breathed through my head yet.
Finally, I get to Exorcism. Let’s say I was drawn/driven to it, it’s not that shit you do for fun.
Starting to get warm.
At 2x, a pain and deep pressure in the middle of my chest and/or my heart. Just like with Covid, if anyone is familiar (except not the lungs). Pressure increasing. Feels like it’s resisting. Gotta think of physical risks (e.g., heart attack?).
One more play. An additional pain near my underarm.
- Is this normal / to be expected?
- Would have looped, but should I? I read I should do 2x.
- Risks? Physical or mental? I still have a full time job that requires my brain and I’m lethargic enough as is.
The pain stayed with me a good part of the day BUT immediately my mind was clearer, I felt more awake and energized, and well, if you discount the rather concerning subject, in a brighter mood.
Since it was already quite intense and didn’t know whether to relisten, continued with When Nothing Else Works from SZ which comforted me, then Heal Energy Body Advanced from SZ. By this time, the pressure had decreased a bit if I remember correctly and it started to go up my throat. It didn’t exit yet.
Then got up to attend to my appointments.
Got back home in the evening, started thinking about it. My body has been giving me signals on certain words and ideas before deciding to do this. Tonight, the mere thinking of these words has been making my chest shake, a couple of times (not in meditation). Mentally and emotionally ok, very calm. Ooh, now a lump in my throat is throbbing! Head getting hotter, feverish, headache, symptoms similar to energy overwhelment. Increasing.
I’m writing this in said tone, but this is very serious stuff to me and I have no experience dealing with it.
But it has come to this, it is time. I want this shit out.
Please advise, it’s quite serious and I want to make sure I am as wise about it as my means allow me and I don’t get fucked up. Ain’t nobody got time to get fucked up.
This is just one part of the matter, not the only thing to be removed. But it’s burning the hottest atm, lemme do this right and close this chapter.
4a) As per Jesus (and some tantric book I read), one should fill up or somehow seal the place that has been left open once shit gets out, so as to not invite other hoardes in. What to do about this? What about free options?
4b) Aftercare?
- I suspect shits to try to resist. How to handle? How to handle during? Only way I know is to let my body do its thing and chillfully observe. Though some hope/reassurance/protection sure would be nice. Ah and deep breathing, writing so I don’t forget.
I’mma head back to my treatment and if all goes well I’m hoping to read some reply in the morning. Or I might peek in between.
Thank you please,