Help with resolving anxiety and trauma from a past relationship

[hotdogduck]

@catspyjamas

What would you advise to be the most powerful ‘stack’ to specifically tackle fear, trauma and negative effects from a short relationship with someone I believe was trying to hurt me emotionally and spiritually (and to a lesser degree trying to make me physically uncomfortable, like cold or tired), just for and giggles, to make themselves feel superior, and make me feel insecure, jealous and sad.

Listen to JAAJ self-love stack JAAJ's Daily Self Love Stack 2024 🤍
You will be able to find much more information on that thread… but to sum it up it essentially helps with the trauma and all that… but on top of that it also makes it so your baseline reality is higher and happier because your self-love is higher. You begin to accept more good things… you also begin to refuse to accept bad things but it is a gradual progress. Also it seems like you are going through a hard time and usually that means you will probably go through a strong detox during the process which lots of people here have already went through.

@catspyjamas

I’m still in limited contact with them, trying to investigate whether my fears about what I think they did are indeed true. I want to know for sure. Should I continue to converse with them? Is there a way to make this person safe for me to be around in order to have a future relationship or friendship with them or do I need to cut off contact? In other words, can someone like this be healed? I already do the Ho oponopono prayer daily in order to heal myself from whatever has caused this person to manifest this problem in my life.

Hmmm at the end of the day it is up to you as I do not know all the details, reasons, info, etc but if you are asking these questions about someone in the first place then that is a big BIG sign to cut contact.
On top of this it was a short relationship so it is not like you guys are going through a “bad phase” which is quite common for any long-term relationship even if it is an overall good relationship.
At the end of the day, for a loving positive relationship, these are not the questions you would be asking in the first place if it was actually good.

@catspyjamas

More generally, I’m also finding it impossible to move forward in life or get any goals met or even enjoy and practice my hobby because my baseline mood is always so low and it’s very easy to disrupt my equilibrium. I feel immobilized in a kind of cPTSD freeze state. My sleep is also terrible and really tired and drained most days.

Before focusing on your goals, I would focus on more foundational things such as your mental health + physical health.
The self-love stack I suggested has a good amount of fields that deal with mental health.
For physical health… I am not an expert on good fields for this but typically as long as you get your
Hydration, Diet, Exercise and sleep on point it should be good lol. No need to overcomplicate it
Do it step by step as well. As long as you make progress that is pretty abundant.
For your goals as well, I am not saying to completely skip them… but take baby steps towards them. Even if 5 minutes of work towards your goals is progress… then that is a win that should be celebrated.

@catspyjamas

What would be the best field to raise my mood for all day happiness/bliss/cheerfulness? Just so I don’t feel so miserable all the time.

Ok… you might not like to hear this but considering the point you are at right now… it may not be super likely that you will be happy and blissful all day everyday until you do some inner work that is pretty painful. Although there are fields that will give you a mood boost… at the end of the day if your baseline is low there is really only so much a field can do. Even if there were a field capable of putting you into a happy and blissful state despite all the turmoil… your inner turmoil would likely bring you back down to a negative state. This feedback loop may lead to an overdependancy on the field that makes you feel good without having to face the turmoil which at that point is sort of like a drug.

@catspyjamas

I have had depression and anxiety on and off all my life, have been diagnosed ADHD and according to my therapist, at least autistic traits.

Hmm… if it was on and off… maybe during the periods it was off there was something that you were doing that reduced it greatly? If there is something that had this effect… then you should make sure to get more of it in your life lol.

Also when the depression and anxiety came back on… maybe there was something in your life that triggered it in the first place? In this case, the right thing to do would be to reduce/cut that thing out as much as possible.

Good luck!