I wasn’t sure where to post this but after listening to Kubera’s Homa and Boon followed by Navagraha Homam a little while ago, I came to the realization that I need to do better for myself in all aspects. I’m feeling that Kubera is aligning me with the correct mindset to make way for wealth and success. I also believe that the planets may have been affecting me lately too.
Just to add, I haven’t smoked weed in a few days which has left my mind restless and needing to fill time. I plan on minimizing my use of it. An overindulgence of dopamine leaves you complacent, with a false sense of reality. I’ve only taken one real break in the past few years whilst being in a workforce development program and interning. During that time I changed my life, I learned so much and felt like the world was in my hands.
I haven’t had that hungry, go-getter, take on the world mentality in a long time. This pandemic doesn’t help any but that’s just another excuse. So many people took this time to get ahead of the game while others are waiting for “things to go back to normal”.
I was just watching the youtubers IceColdJT and Hamza. Seeing Hamza, someone two years older than me, practically living his dream life, made me wake tf up. When I first looked at his page I was thinking I didn’t want to follow him because it would remind me of just how far off I am from him. That must’ve been my ego. Then I realized, let me follow this guy and allow it to be inspiration/accountability to rise to his level.
Feeling envious of someone else’s success is due to your own insecurities, of failure, not rising to your full potential, and knowing that you could be doing so much more with yourself. They are a reminder of hard work, dedication, discipline, and honesty with yourself. I’m competitive, and seeing others doing well fires me up to work on myself.
Shoutout to @Zen and @GoddessAndGodOfAll, who are my rivals in my head 
I say that lovingly, like I said I’m a competitor, y’all are close in age to me. Maybe I’m not expressing myself correctly lol. I see aspects in both of you I admire and would like to attain for myself. Not to say there aren’t other members I admire and that inspire me.
You MUST value your time, and plan how it will be used effectively and productively. I waste so much time and have no plan. Just been going with the flow, thinking success is going to land at my feet since I’m retaining and listening to fields lol. Action MUST be taken. “Seize your moment” is a quote I like from the movie Coco lol
I just got this journal I bought months ago out that I was planning to use for LoA scripting and manifestation but decided to make it my personal journal. We often forget how we feel/felt, especially in these moments of realization and motivation for improvement and the future.
Journaling allows you to see what your past self was thinking and feeling and the progression of these things changing. Failing to recognize destructive habits, thought forms, and people will have you repeating the same cycles over and over.
I do apologize for the long read, having a mechanical keyboard with clicky keys makes me want to type
I hope it was worth your time! Thank you!
This whole forum and community is a vast pool of knowledge, with gurus from all walks of life. The wisdom is here waiting for you to tap into it, and apply it to your human experience. The same can be said for the world and the internet in general. Maybe one day Dream can make a field to tap in/download the consciousness and knowledge of the forum 
almost a bit uncomfortable