Welcome to the forum, genuwine. I’m sorry to hear of your distress.
I cannot. I feel like perhaps you’ve started your narrative in the middle and, as such, we’re missing some important details. For example, what led you to decide to listen to the ocd field in the first place? That choice of yours suggests (to me, at least) that you might have had some of this already going on before you started listening to your Sapien fields.
In this situation, I strongly urge you to seek out the help of qualified local mental health professionals. Having suicidal thoughts racing constantly is a serious matter for you to get some professional help with. This is not something for you to handle on your own or to turn to random strangers on the Internet. This is condition that needs a proper diagnosis, factoring in the many aspects of your life which may or mayn’t play a role in what’s going on for you right now.
It’s easy for me to tell you that, when properly listened to, Sapien fields do not cause what you’re describing, and I would be accurate in telling you that. But my telling you that doesn’t help you with what you’re going through. This is where your local, qualified mental health professional comes in, to help you.
As far as your subliminal experience is concerned, you might want to try a “subliminal flush.” I can’t recommend one to you but we have a thread (Discussion for other similar Channels on YouTube) where you can find some guidance of who might have a flush for you to use.
And, please, do seek proper, local, qualified mental health for your other issue. You’re worth getting that kind of help for you!