I honestly didn’t think I would experience this kind of experience again, not to blame anyone, it is what it is, it was just so sudden, even if it was easy to expect but, this way ?
I played a mmorpg with people 15 years ago, we had a guild, I was the youngest, they were all (young) adults, it was exactly the same kind of environnement than here, people backing up each other, we had fun, talking about everything, spending a lot of time together, knowing everyone’s life (more or less here) and every day at school I was just waiting to join them again, we all had different lifes and ages but everyone was oriented toward one unique goal, it was not just a video game, those guys had really good influence on me and I saw them like big brothers/sisters whom I admired so much. When someone is kind, I never forget it, it means so much to me.
We had even a forum like this, we could write stories, compose songs, sharing a lot of things, we were 24/24 7/7 together online playing whenever we could, I didn’t even need real life friends at that time, I liked them but the online friends were very special, it was a dream. When everything was over, there was nothing to do the guild master had already made his mind, most of the members kept in touch even today, after 15 years.
I stopped playing this game for 6 whole years because of the memories and trauma from the dissolution of the guild, I was 9 years old thinking we would all spend time together forever. Playing other games was flavorless without them, maybe I was depressed, I didn’t smile for a whole year after that.
I came back 6 years later and some of the members were still playing so we hanged around, it was extremely saddening to not see particular nicknames appearing or even seeing their characters were deleted, they were like a family for me.
I still remember all of their nicknames, one of them was so kind I took his nickname to create my passwords out of admiration.
Some of them vanished completely, some didn’t want to have any business with the guild anymore, some (including me) literally quit the game because my reason to play was them, they were the ones making that experience special.
Some members told me they created a new guild with the remaining members so I stayed and was extremely happy to play with them again but it came to an end too but peacefully this time, everyone moved on from the game because of life.
Now, you may wonder what is the link with the forum ? It’s a similar situation. Internet is beautiful, we are all far away but the (good and bad) memories stay deep inside.
Some people had the habit to come here nearly every day, they bonded, some see this place as an escape from reality, to have contact with people, not being judged and a way to solve issues.
I personally think it’s dangerous and I already saw how this kind of thing when doing the wrong way can affect even grown adults, the most sensitive/empathic one may have a big wound that will never close because of this. It’s not the fact that it’s over, we all agree maybe about being grateful, how he changed our lives, the way it ended though…
I will not only memorizing the beginning and the ending because except of this, 99% of the time was really nice here and I won’t use that specific event to define all the forum or Dream but I have mixed feelings.
I NEVER interacted with Dream directly or even indirectly to not annoy with useless things. It’s the first time, I do it :
I don’t know how he is doing and what state of mind he is right now but even if I’m really not ok with how it was managed, I hope he is doing better. If he had to do that, maybe there was no other options, maybe he was really tired and kept doing everything to exhaustion. Hope he is safe and whatever the reason behind that, he has my support. Thanks for everything, without this forum, it’s hard to tell where I would be but I keep all the good memories this time, letting things go.
It was a big message I wanted to share, the last one probably from the master in yapping.
