I was consistent with the pu patreon version for 10 weeks ! it took a toll on me and i had to take a slight break from it but i want to start reusing. the reason i stopped was bcz a lot of bad stuff that happened to me kept resurfacing and i wouldnt stop thinking about it and it was too painful to confront. anyways, i think i recovered and will start using it again
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Hey Jaaj, I know you also have a wealth stack. Just wondering, do you have any plans to make more of these stacks but a different topic?
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Yes, I had plans. But donāt have time for this anymoreā¦
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Hi, Iām on Stage 2 of the Self Love Stack. Where can I can find the Alchemical Revision and Pre Potential Revison of Sexual Trauma from the free fields? Iāve looked on YouTube, Odysee and Patreon, but canāt find it anywhere.
Thank you! 
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It is a Patreon premium field so you will not be able to find it anymore.
Psychic University released a sexual trauma field on his Patreon which can be used as a substitute.
If you do not want to spend money on Psychic Universityās Patreon, you can just use the free trauma fields and actively focus on the sexual traumatic events of your past (if any). The trauma fields will then work on your sexual trauma.
If you instead want to passively listen to the trauma fields, that is fine as well. They will eventually heal the sexual trauma of your past anyways as they work on ALL traumas which includes sexual trauma. Keep in mind this will take longer tho as the fields are not targeted towards sexual traumaā¦
Hope this helps! 
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Yes, thank you, I appreciate it 
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Month 3 (Jan 2026)
It is a new year. I listen to each stage for a week so that means 28 days. At the end of 28 days I take a break until the next month so I will post my reviews around this time as well.
Week 1 (Trauma)
- Ok I am having a bad BAD detox with the trauma fields this week. Perhaps maybe because this is the first time I have done some active work with them? Idkā¦ but the detox means the field are working. Does not mean that it is enjoyable or positiveā¦ but in the long term I will have a better life due to this.
- Ok lol because of this bad detox I am now aware that some bad situations I have manifested into my life is due to low self-worth. If I did not have a low-self worth in the first place I would not have been there in the first place. This seems to be especially important to me for romance. So how does one increase self-worth? I mean obviously JAAJ self-love worksā¦ but what are some active ways to increase self-worth? I do not really know. I wonder why school has not taught us this because this is more important that any math, physics, english etcā¦ but I mean I have the internet as well so I guess I always could have looked it up but truthfully I do not even think I had a grasp of the concept of self-worth until a few months ago. Like yes, it was mentioned here and there but it was sort of a woo-woo concept that was for weirdosā¦ at least that is the image I had of it but clearly I was mistaken. But because I am now fully aware I am have a low-self worth, it puts me into the perfect position to raise it. What is pretty cool tho, is that despite having a low-self worth I still think I have lived a pretty good life? Maybe this will sort of be like a Stockholm syndrome where my future self looks back and think it was not a good life at all, I was jut not aware of something betterā¦but at least to my current self I have still lived a good life. So if I increase my self-worth I can have an amazing life.
- This is one of the worst detoxes I have had. I am only on day 3 of the trauma stack. Usually this terrible detox means life changing effects afterwards but damnā¦ right now I am literally acting like an asshole. I am usually never an asshole as wellā¦ perhaps all the asshole actions directed towards me are coming out? Idk.
- TBHā¦ I think over our life we have tons of mini traumasā¦ but these do not seem to affect our life that much as I am aware. However over our life, we have a few deep deep traumas that are quite bigā¦ and these are the traumas that take some time to heal. However healing them will lead to life changing benefits. So for me particularly, I have a very bad romantic experience trauma and before I thought I could just listen to the trauma healing fields 3 times for 1 day and then have it be fixedā¦ but it usually does not work out like that. It seems this romantic trauma has LAYERS that need to be confronted one by oneā¦ it is sort of like peeling an onion. Peeling an onion takes time and even if there was a field that could heal this massive trauma in an instantā¦ it would likely be equivalent to a gym beginner trying to bench press 300 poundsā¦ it would just backfire. So from my current knowledge of trauma healing, trauma needs to be processed step by step. The human body is not designed to relieve massive trauma instantly (I am still a rookie when it comes to this topic tho).
- As I release more and more traumas, I become a better person and friend and family member and there is physical proof. Recently, I started to keep track of a birthday list and holiday list. Essentially the people I would wish happy birthday and holidays to. I have never done this before. So it hit me that over time, we get insulted/attacked by some other humansā¦ and this stays in our system as traumaā¦ and this trauma tends to remind us of the cruelty of humans which lowers our image of humans. When your image of humans lowers, then your treatment towards them and yourself naturally goes down as they seem less worthy. (Iām aware we are more than just humans etc, but for the moment that we are on physical earth playing this game, a part of us is human.). Anyways that may explain some āassholeā behaviourā¦ perhaps an āassholeā has been treated so poorly by other humans that the they internalized the belief that all humans are āassholesā which leads them to treating others like assholes, which ironically makes then an asshole! Anyways, the point is self-love makes you a better person by allowing you to love yourself and others more which naturally leads you to treating yourself and others better.
- Hmmā¦ I am even less tolerant of BS now. When you increase your self-love you will gradually get treated better and better of others. Part of this includes your BS meter evolving. Because lets face itā¦ at the end of the day, no matter how kind/helpful you are to everyone, very few people will still treat you like crap
. But basically my BS meter is much more responsive at detecting BS from others and from there I can just distance myself. Perhaps this may explain simping behaviour. All my life, I never really understood simpsā¦ I mean, they waste so much precious time and energy on a person that is stringing them on. And most of the time, the person they are simping for is also a bumā¦ so even if they were to get into relationship with that person its not like they have gained much. But perhaps simps have a really low self-worthā¦ which leads to them DESPERATELY seeking self-worth from external sources combined with the fact that their low-self love means they have a weak BS meter as they are not aware how āgetting treated betterā actually looks and feels like so they believe this is normal and fine. And to be fair, if you have really low self-love, I guess your ānormalā will be a shit show. Also keep in mind simping is relevant to BOTH genders. I know it typically refers to males romanticizing a female, but at least in my personal life and experience, it seems that females simp for males more as well as put up with more BS than males. OFC it depends on the relationship and individuals at the end of the day, but the point is that this is important for both genders! - I have started skincare again. Iām not even going to lie, before I did skincare because I did not think I was beautiful enough which led me to overbuying products and OVERREACH for that glass skin. (My skin was already pretty nice thanks to skin fields) However, during the first month of my self-love stack I realized this and threw out all my skincare. However, as my self-love raises I realize I can take care of my skin from a vibration of self-love instead of SEEKING validation. So that is what I have been doing. I bought a amazing cleanser and pretty good moisturizer and my skin looks better today than it did yesterday. So from now on, I intend to take very good care of my body, skin and hair out of a vibration of self-love
- Ok so this is quite interestingā¦ but when I went to buy my skincare, I did not dress up or put much effort into my appearance. I mean it is just a simple errand so I just want to buy my skincare and go back homeā¦ however when I went out I noticed a got a lot of attraction from guys and women. Even when I was walking behind someone who was dressed sharper than me, I still noticed people looking past the person in front of me and at me. It was also a rest day from fields other than trauma stage, so the only fields I played that day were revision/trauma fields which I doubt helps with attraction. So I was thinking about this when I realized that because I have become a better person, my energy has gotten more attractive which has boosted attraction from everyone. Everyone can subconsciously sense (especially women) the type of person you are based on the energy you projectā¦ and because the self-love stack has made me more loving, kind, caring, etc more people are attracted to me!!! And I cannot think of a better reason to be attracted to someone based on their character, because this will lead to deep, loving relationships!
- I dress better now. Today when I was looking through my closet, I saw a shirt with holes in it. In the past I would have said to keep itā¦ idk why but today I threw it out immediately with no guilt, no fear etc. I have also been listening to abundance mindset as well, but I also do believe self-love stack had a play in this.
- I now understand more about romance and what makes a good romantic relationship. (Keep in mind I am a 22 year old with not the most romantic experience, so if someone with a wife reads this and sees I am wrong, please just tell me LMAO). Anyways, growing up I did not have much romance due to self-sabotage and fear of intimacy but I have always been blessed with amazing friends. We are all so different yet so compatible and we have stood the test of time and multiple challenges such as going to different Universities and gridlocks, yet we still have remained close friends. The feeling I get when I am around my close friends is that of extreme safety and love. I feel like I can just be 100% myself and be accepted and loved for it so I do not have to perform at all. This is what I believe I should be looking for in a romantic relationship . Nowadays, it seems like so many relationships are performance-based and from a young age, males are usually taught that you need to be the MOST HANDSOME, MOST BUFF, MOST RICH MALE IN THE ROOM CAUSE THEN YOU WILL BE ALPHA AND GET LOTS OF GIRLS!!! However this just attracts superficial relationships. And lets face it, there are plenty of people who have those same qualities so the people you will attract with this attitude will not lead to something very fulfilling and deep. Furthermore it is likely that the second someone with more money comes they will probably just leave you. Pretty brutalā¦ but it really does not need to be this way. Instead if people were to approach romance more authentically and try not be performance-based at all, they would attract compatible partners which they could have amazing relationships with. So lets see where this mindset takes me. (ofc attract love field helps with this as well but as powerful as fields areā¦ we always gotta do our part as well)
- I am not going to lie, the trauma stage is not enjoyable. I mean I have to go through traumaās and when you do process traumaās it sucks. It is painfulā¦ but every time I process a trauma to point that it is transmuted I feel more free and liberated.
- When I go on walks now, I notice that I am now able to wave and smile at people as I walk by them and actually want to do it. I have not ever been able to do this since childhood/phases where I felt very VERY good. But this is neither of those. I mean because I am just going on a walk, I just dressed casually and I am in the middle of the self-love trauma stage so I have actually been in a detox phase which does not feel too good haha. So I guess I am more social?
- Ok earlier this week I was sort of making a theory on how heavy trauma needs to be worked on in layers. Now I am 100% sure this is the case. I will give you an example. One of my heaviest traumaās has to do romantic heartbreakā¦ and this Trauma has quite a few layers. For example there is the emotional layer which has a lot of layers already. I mean pain, guilt, shame, loss, embarrassment, anger etc were all present and each of those had to be worked through one by one. Then there is the memory layer, where there are quite a few painful memories, and each memory/moment needs to be worked through one by one. Then there is the mindset layer, where my mindset has become a little more negative because of the trauma. Anyways, you get the idea. I am still not 100% free of this trauma, but you know what? It does not hurt nearly as bad as before. I can recall some memories of the incident and not go emo mode haha I can just remain chill about it. That being said it is not 100% processed but I am getting there.
- To expand on the previous point, we can also add layers of self-love. These layers of self-love will lead to a better reality which is probably the whole purpose of this self-love stack: to heal layers of trauma and emotional pain and transmute them into layers of self-love. Each layer of self-love will improve your reality. From my 3 months It has been gradual and smooth but also pretty fast and strong. 3 months ago I was not confident/whole at all, but now I can say that I am actually pretty confident and a lot more whole than before.
- I am the most financially abundant I have been in a long time. So before self-love stack, I was not feeling whole for around a year. And a coping mechanism is to over purchase useless things because I can get a short high which masks the emptiness for a bit. However, the root cause of the emptiness was never dealt with so I would fall back into the same cycle. The truth is that as long as I felt that emptiness I would return to the same behaviour. But self-love stack has made me feel more whole which means I no longer feel the need to buy stuff. While I am not at the point where I can just exist and feel completely whole, I have reached a point where I no longer cope with buying things for a quick high. Keep in mind, I have also been listening to guided path + abundance mindset + millionaire mindset which also helped, but the self-love stack has helped with finances in this regard
- The deepest parts of our subconscious lets us only accept the things that we feel we deserve. This is something Dream has written on the gratitude and abundance thread (at least I think it was written by Dream???) and is 100% true. Although I cannot explain it fully at this moment as I do not have a good enough conscious understanding of it, I sort of have a subconscious/conceptual understanding of it if it makes sense. Hopefully one day I can explain it to all of you here in simple English once I have a good grasp on it.
- The world has come aliveā¦ idk how else to describe this but it has.
Week 2 (Forgiveness) (5-10 Min Of Active Work Per Session)
- There are lots of grudges I hold that I WAS not even aware of. Of course we all probably have a few people who have wronged us who we need to forgiveā¦ which also needs to be processed in layers as well but there are tons of mini grudges. For example during high school and University I have had some āFriendsā who slide insults every now and then and frame it as a ājokeā. OFC there are people who tease you out of love, but I feel like I am able to decipher the difference now. The reason a grudge has formed because there is a sense of betrayal and disbelief + shock as it turns out some of my āfriendsā are not really good friends after all. I am still rather new to forgiveness and all the benefits but I am aware that it is really important for self-love which I explained in month 2 week 2.
- My tolerance for BS has once again went down. Although I have yet to have a physical reality situation that illustrates this, my mental + dream worlds have changed. Basically I feel like if I were to receive a direct insult from a friend/family/anyone, I would just stare them in the eye and say sternly ādonāt insult me.ā. No need for aggression, but it is stern and I am aware this is not something I would have done before. I have also had dreams where I would stand up to bullies in my past. I was rarely bullied but I still have had experiences of being bullied.
- Ok I am debating on removing some people from my life although I am scared to do it not going to lie. I will update how this goes.
- Ok so I have a better understanding of the overall mechanics of trauma now. First off, the reason why so many people are not very aware of their trauma is because that is how we are designed. In order to function optimally at the present, the subconscious suppresses trauma deep down. Because if all our traumas were consciously present we literally would not be able to function. It would be great to suppress trauma and not have it have any impact, but when the trauma remains deep down in the subconscious, it will subconsciously dictate your behaviour/life with a self-sabotaging behaviour. This self-sabotaging behaviour can manifest as any pattern such as but not limited to: overeating, laziness, fear of intimacy, addiction, self-abuse, cruelty towards others, etc. Now keep in mind, through pure willpower and action, it is possible to not engage in these behaviours and create new positive patterns instead, but that requires an insane amount of willpower that is able to break through all the chains and weight that trauma holds that most people do not have. If everyone had that insane willpower, they would not be fat/poor/cruel in the first place right? So by healing the trauma, you lift the weight, which makes it easier to get in shape/make money/ become kinder or just have a better life. Keep in mind, pure physical action is still required, but a trauma free and healthy happy self-loving person will naturally do the right actions. At least this has been the case for me in my self-love journey, more and more I have been doing the right things.
- To expand on the previous point, I feel like I am about to have a break through in my trauma healing. My subconscious has hinted that a very specific horrible horrible thing happened to me in the past that has been deeply suppressed. I really really do not want to believe it is true but honestly at this point if I am writing this sentence, it probably is. Sooner or later, the exact memory/trauma/details will probably bubble up to my conscious mind. will update once I am aware of more. Honestly one of these nights I feel like I am going to have a dream that reveals exactly what happened. I am 100% going to scream lol I hope my family does not think I am too crazy
- Hey for the first time in a long time, I feel more and more like I am able to get into a romantic relationship. As explained, I used to have a deep fear of intimacy to trauma which was explained in my month 2 post for those who want more details but basically I feel sort of ready to actually get into a romantic relationship. As I learned with this process tho, I will take it step by step.
- I have gotten more beautiful. There is physical proof now. I have a glow. Perhaps my self-love has given myself a glow?
- Ok I am more innocent now and I have also began to value innocence a lot more now. Before I thought innocence just meant naive, but it is different. Innocence just means free of corruptionā¦ and who wouldnāt want to be free of corruption? I had a self-sabotage mechanism (and have also seen this self-sabotage mechanism in a lot of other people!!!) where you sort of look down on innocence and associate with naiveness and stupidity because you have been corrupt yourself. For me, the root cause of this was that I was identifying with my trauma. I was coping because I was hoping the trauma served some sort of purpose in my life but it does not. Trauma does not make you strongerā¦ it does not build character. Trauma makes you weaker, less kind, less happy etc, it just makes your life worse. All the science research backs this conclusion as well, but if you are not one to be convinced by science, then heal your trauma yourself with this stack and see how your life changes. Of course, the traumatic experience could have provided some benefit (learning how to deal with a bully, etc) but overall, trauma is a net negative to your life. So I am going to stop coping about my trauma and just admit that it is bad for me and that it negatively affects my life.
- To expand on the previous point, it seems like lots of people (including my past self!!!) will counter my previous argument with something along the lines of āTrauma builds character!!!ā to which I say it really does not. Most of the time, traumatized people are usually the meanest and most cruel. Second off, once I started healing trauma, I began to become a better person every week and it will probably be the same for you. The science also does not support the conclusion at all. Furthermore, even if some of your traumatic experiences does build character in some way, at the end of the day, there are still much much better ways to build character. Since we are on this forum, we can just listen to Knight/warrior mindset or the way of integrity field but other non traumatic ways of building character would be setting big goals, building a fit body, becoming a better romantic partner, etc. At the end of the day, the point is to stop coping about your trauma by acting like it has a positive effect on your life when it does not.
- Yoooooo I came to a big realization when it comes to romance. I realize that I subconsciously place myself under the girl lots of the time! The reason I do this is because, during my childhood years, my mom would always be the one handing out the beating/abuse to the child version of me which sort of reinforced a very imbalanced power dynamic which I guess I internalized and have been unconsciously applying to my male/female dynamics for romance. (I still love my mom and understand she tried her best but this is really just how it is). This would also explain a certain phenomenon in my life where in my dating life, I always end up dating/attracting people who are not as high quality as me/ on a lower level. They were not bad under any means but just not quite where I am (I really hope this does not sound like I am putting myself on a pedestal but that really how it is!) This has also been commented on many MANY times by my friends and family as well. Truthfully, I am also aware. Now of course, when it comes to love, I think it is ok to date someone who might not be up to your standard as long as you both love each other, however this is still a self-sabotage pattern I need to heal. Also it seems like the women I have dated have also not really felt this pattern/trauma as they have treated me quite well but maybe that is because they were at a lower level in the first place so my self-sabotage essentially evens us out? So now I am aware that putting yourself below is not the way to do it. So from here on out I am not really sure? Do I create the self-image I am above them or on equal standing with them and have equal power dynamics? - I am completely new to this territory but my guess would be the latter but hopefully one day I can explain to you guys in simple English what the solution to this is!
- To expand on the previous pointā¦ you can look at other people for an example! We have all seen it!!! In my experience, I have sometimes witnessed sweet and pretty girls go with dudes who are questionable, vice versa as well. Now sometimes, they do this out of love and if that is the case, good for themā¦ but sometimes you can tell it is not quite out of love. Perhaps part of the reason they do this is because they had an abusive parent of the opposite gender which reinforced very imbalanced male/female power dynamics growing up? I am also not really sure what the solution to this is at the moment but as I have come to learn, JAAJ self-love stack probably got it
- I have been going on mini adventures which have added a lot to my life! This mini adventure habit has came into my life due to a mixture of things. First off I am less fearful of the outside and have less trauma about what will go wrong. Second off, I am more confident, I walk more and more like I am big boss gangster haha. Third off, I have more wonder, love and joy, so going on this adventures literally is more joyful then it would have been a month ago. I guess the increased self-love on all levels has manifested a more cool and wondrous life!
Week 3 (Self-Love) (10-15 Min Of Active Work Per Session)
- Ok for a brief moment in the shower today, I felt like I am enough just as I am. IDK how to describe it but it was a great feeling. I guess it is a good sign I am reaching there!
- Hmmm, it looks like before attracting a romantic interest into my life it seems I am currently more focused/interested on becoming whole and loving myself as I am without a girlfriend as well as loving my life as it is without a girlfriend. Idk if this is a good approach but one thing I am aware of is that when it comes to love, you attract what you are. So if I were to reach this state I would attract someone who has high levels of self-love and is already living a life they love soā¦ idk
- Ok so I have been on this self-love stack for 10 weeks and I can confirm I am totally a different person. Before due to trauma I was pretty anxious and all that but now I am pretty confident and I can walk by and smile and wave at people effortlessly. I also feel much more fearless and confident. So this is 10 weeks of this already. I have only been increasing my active work as well so it only gets better.
- Situations that I did not even think were bothering meā¦ do end up bothering me subconsciously. Only once you bring it up consciously and heal it will you realize this.
- Not chasing your ideals/dreams is a trauma response. Think about it, as a kid you were always set on attaining your fantasies/ideals/dream or whatever you want to call it and up until the beginning of adolescence it was encouraged. Once adolescence begins thoā¦ suddenly the adults/teachers who encouraged you suddenly switch sides and tell you to be ārealisticā. This ends up being deeply traumatic as your own tribe that once encouraged you switched so there is a great deal of shock and betrayal. Furthermore, in the mind of a 12/13 year old, we still hold the strong belief that āadults/teachers know bestā because it is what we were taught growing up and going against their will could lead to loss of shelter, food, water, and your tribe etc. This lead to me and everyone else pursuing a ānormalā path which leads to a normal life. But once you love yourself, a normal life is no longer good enoughā¦ because there is so much more out there. So guess who finally summed up the courage + confidence to take a gap year to chase my ideals? I didā¦ and while I am not my dream life, I can say I am on the right way there. (BPIL hardcore also helped with this)
- To expand on the previous point, the adults/teacher are just projecting their own failure of not being able to attain their own dreams onto youā¦ they have a failure mindset along with a massive ego that thinks along the lines of āIf I cannot do itā¦. nobody can!!! and therefore neither can this kid!!!ā. But if you really think about itā¦ if we all started to chase our dreams when we were able to which is probably around teenage age so lets say 14-15 years old, it would not be stupid at all to say that we all would achieve significant progress towards our dream. Some of us may attain it, and some of us will achieve good progress, but progress on your dream path always outweighs success on a path you donāt care about. Nothing wrong with a normal pathā¦ but if we are being honestā¦ how many adults do you see that seem to love their job/life on a ānormalā path.
Week 4 (Become Love) (10-15 Min Of Active Work Per Session)
- I have noticed that recently I have sort of been getting alpha male treatment. This sounds cringe and seems stupidā¦ but it really is a decent way of describing it LMAO. I have always been treated quite well and well-respected and popular but I have not been getting this treatment. Also I am in good shape but I would not consider myself buff or super masculine either. My guess would be that the increased confidence + self-respect has helped, but I think the main thing is that I have turned into someone who has the GUTS to chase my dreams despite the fear, anxiety etcā¦ and everyone picks up on that and deeply admires/respects that. I meanā¦ before I had the guts to chase my ideals, I always had a deep admiration/respect for those who had the courage to tell everyone their dreams and align their life towards that regardless of the current success. I always thought they were badass whether it was a cute little girl or a masculine alpha looking man.
- I am kinder now. Before I was always pretty kind but I am more kind now. For example, when someone says something stupid/funny, I would make fun of them sometimes to try and tease them. Nothing too harmful tbh but recently I have not felt the urge to do it. I just remain neutral to it and just not tease them or put them down.
- I gradually seek less and less external validation. To give an example, I went on a date recently and things did not go very well. In the past I would have been like āok time to grind so I can show everyone I am better!!!ā But I did not really care for that. I was just like okā¦ guess we are not compatible and that is that. I will go on my path and she will continue on hers. No need to burn a bridge with a dramatic ending but also no need to spend any more time with each other either .
- By the way, I have mentioned getting more consistent with the gym near the start. Well to update on that, I have gained 15 pounds!!! I am pretty sure it was mostly muscle as well as I always had a rather slim build and do not see more fat than before. I have a slight V shape now as well. The most amazing part about this, is that during the whole process, I never felt my body was not enough. I always loved my body the way it is. It made the journey a lot easier and enjoyable. 15 pounds in 3 months is really good! (I used muscle fields as well lol). I already had a lean build with a good amount of muscle but now I have more muscle. Not ripped yet but more muscular.
- To expand on the previous point, usually with body transformation videos, at the start where they have not underwent a body transformation, they usually a project a strange needy energy that feels like they believe they absolutely have to achieve an aesthetic body or else they have low self-worthā¦. While this does usually lead to a body transformation, keep in mind it is driven by low vibrations such as desperation, fear, shame etcā¦. Furthermore, once those kinds of people do achieve an aesthetic body, you will notice something interesting where they never think their body is enough and thus always keep going!!! Additionally they start projecting shame towards those who do not have an āaestheticā body which just makes them a worser person overall as they are just making everyone around them feel worse off. The point is to accept and love yourself as you are. It sounds cheesy and cringey because of all these instagram teenage girls always use this phrase even tho they have no idea what it actually entails. Once you go through with this stack and relate to the statement ālove and accept yourself as you areā you will realize just how powerful it is!
Real World Physical Benefits After Month 3
- Better Family Member
- Better Friend
- Better Person/Character
- Better treatment from others
- Less tolerant of BS
- I take better care of my body
- More general attraction from both genders (I am a male)
- Better Style
- More Social
- More abundant/wealthy
- My World has come alive
- Less fear of intimacy/more willing to dive into romance
- More beautiful/glowy
- More Innocence
- More adventurous
- I had enough courage to tell my parents directly that I am taking a gap year from school to chase my ideals
- I chase my ideals/dreams now
- More kind
- Less needy of external validation
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I recently started listening again not too long ago and have similar results as u 
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Month 4 (Feb 2026)
Week 1 (Trauma)
- I am beginning to be able to pick up concepts and learn lessons from other people. This is in fact due to conceptual conglomerate but it was not this effective before, so self-love has elevated the results of fields.
- I have fully healed from a medium level trauma. Not minor but not super heavy eitherā¦ but the lesson I learned is more important. From this I can now fully say with full confidence that with fields and active work you can fully heal from traumas no matter how heavy. So as a result I am a better version of myself.
- I have finally worked up the courage to start blocking people who should not be a part of my life. Of course, I can just stay distanced, but blocking sends a different message to your subconscious and self-image. It affirms the fact that āI am someone who refuses to let troublesome people stay in any part of my lifeā. Blocking EXITS them out of your reality bubble completely but not talking to them but still having them as a contact keeps a link/cord open which keeps you where you are.
- Now of course, with lots of close family/friends you will have fights/periods where things are a little rough, but there will be a difference. The difference is that BOTH of you are trying to find a solution to the conflict and resolve it so things are great again. If a person just refuses to work things out, then this person should not be in your life.
- What is great about increasing self-love is that you start blocking people not out of anger/hate or something like that. Rather I have forgiven these people, but because I have forgiven them, I can see the picture clearly with no emotional clouding over it and just accept the fact this is what should be done. I have seen people block others out of emotional impulse (I have done the same as well) but this is just a surface level solution. Because sooner or later, their subconscious will direct them into another situation where someone wrongs them and they get the emotional impulse to block someone again! So there are 2 solutions to encountering people who are not very good for your well-being. 1. You can increase your self-love as once you do so, you will begin running into better people. 2. You can take lots of physical real world action to improve yourself which will then improve the people you run into. I am currently doing both and doing both is the most efficient route I am aware of.
- I am less lustful and more loving.
Week 2 (Forgiveness)
- I have mentioned this so many times, but I have once again noticed I seek less external validation. I did not realize how much I SEEK validation before, but layer by layer I realize I seek it less and less.
- I have a stronger meter for people now. I am able to better detect whether someone is good spending time with or not.
- Ok I have decoded another layer as to why this forgiveness stack is important. So one of the main benefits of forgiveness is letting negative things go. This means that you let negative things go from your being at a subconscious level. The problem with having these patches of repressed negativity within your subconscious is that it will manifest a more negative reality for you. So once you forgive, you let go of the negativity and allow your reality to jump up to a new level
- Additionally, forgiveness also includes self-forgiveness which is also extremely important. Until you forgive yourself, you will hold grudges towards yourselfā¦ and when you hold grudges towards yourself, you treat yourself how you would when you hold a grudge towards a specific someone. Basically you do not treat yourself well which leads to a worser life. Self-forgiveness lets you let go of grudges towards yourself and allows your reality to jump higher ā So forgive yourself.
- Okā¦ so I am pretty sure I have stumbled upon another secret of the universe: gratitude. Now of course I make sure to do my nightly gratitude affirmations and I also affirm gratitude here and there everydayā¦ but I am talking about disciplined levelling up of gratitude. I am talking about being grateful 1000 times a day (not a typo 1000 = one thousand). But I also need to work up to that as well. So what happens if I am grateful 1000 times daily? Well I will find out and figure it out. Hopefully you can learn a lot from this post as well.
- Ok yea this is me writing 10 minutes later butā¦. gratitude is a cheat code. Basically, gratitude puts you into the flow of āhavingāā¦ so if you work hard to keep growing your gratitude (gratitude is a skill that be levelled up) your āhavingā increasesā¦ until the point you have everythingā¦
- Ohā¦ something cool happened todayā¦ so today I was talking with my grandma and she has a habit where she assumes I cannot do something and then I was just making small talk and it somehow ended up with me telling her how I ran out of shampoo and need to buy more so I wonder what is a nice shampoo. She responded with āyou canāt buy shampooā (keep in mind we were having a convo in Mandarin and the I just translated her sentence literally, but the meaning of her sentence is more something like ā āyou do not have the ability/capability to buy shampooā) to which I immediately responded ādonāt tell me I canāt do something.ā sternly and politely. Even I was shockedā¦ but you know what? My self-respect has gone up and what is weird is that I also actually believe the respect my grandma has for me shot up as well. OFC when friends tease youā¦ it is sometimes out of love but my grandma was being serious so yea
- I am having a bad detox
Week 3 (Self-Love)
- Today I went on a nature walkā¦ and I came to lots of realizations.
- I realized that I am not special in any particular way. However, even though I am not special or perfect, I love myself. I feel like with social mediaā¦ everyone has made their life special by posting the the top 0.01% moments of their life. Even tho everyone knows this is an illusion, it still seems like when you consistently go on social media it makes you feel like you are not enough. It makes you feel like you HAVE TO be special or have a special life. Although I am not special, I feel like I have a special life. I mean maybe from a third person view, I might not have a special life but I believe I have a special life so who cares what others think right?
- I also came to another harsh realization. You knowā¦ at the start of high school I hung out and was one of the āpopular kidsā (lol this is so cringe looking back but thats how it was back in high school). However, the stereotype is that usually popular kids are assholes and that was true back then. I was an asshole in high school and my āfriendsā (really just people to do drugs and do bad things with) were also not great people. In grade 9 I realized this and fell into a bad period because I realized just how unfortunate my high school life has become. However I continued hanging out with the popular kids because I did not have another group to hang outā¦ that was until grade 10 where I finally met a pair of guys in my Spanish class who I got along with so well. I never had this feeling before other than with my 2 childhood best friends. Then I found out, in another period of class, they were also getting along with my childhood best friend as well as my brother!!! We ended up arranging a hang out outside of school and ever since that hangout we realized how well we fit with each other and spent everyday together since then. Additionallyā¦ during lunch periods, we tended to hang out at the same spot in the library every single day and I guess some other guys who thought we were chill decided to join us so our group expanded even more with 3 more guys! So we had a group of 8 that eventually went down to 6 at this current day. Anyways we went off to Uni and I guess during 1st year of Uni I got into red pill and followed the advice so my social life bloomed. Meanwhile my high school friends grew after 1st year but were still in essence the same. However I was ādifferentā because I was ācoolā so I thought I was too good for them and stopped hanging out with them during the summer and was cold to them. Shortly tho I realized how stupid this was and went back to them. However, since then although I am close with them and am still part of the inner circle, I am not as close with them as before and they are closer with each other than me. There is still that slight disconnect which I only have myself to blame. The point of this was that I got into red-pill and put on a cool surface for University because I did not love myself enough. However beneath it allā¦ I really was just a shy and sweet boy haha. And that is what my OG friends see me as and love me for. Even when I went to Uni and got in with the ācoolā kids again, it struck me that we only hang out with each other because all of us are considered ācoolā by other people. If one day I was no longer ācoolā I would be shunned by my ācoolā University group. However, my OG friends love me for who I amā¦ and that is what I want out of any relationship, friendship etc. So I am blessed with amazing friends.
- I have reached a point where I am noticing more and more patterns where I attach my self-worth to external validation? I wonder why I do this? Perhaps this is the root cause of why I was seeking external validation in the first place? I am questioning thisā¦if my self-worth is not based on external validationā¦ what is it based on? Do I choose what its based on? Maybe I can choose it to base it on nothing other than what I believe it to be and consciously edit my self-worth to make it higher to see if that improves my reality? IDKā¦ guess Iāll try to figure it out and update here. That is so weird thoā¦ I swear I have been brain washed to attach my self-worth based on external thingsā¦ but gradually that is no longer the case anymore. I believe internal high self-worth will attract great external things. Cuz that has been my journey so far for these first few months of JAAJ self-love stack.
- Recently I have been having thoughts of taking my body more seriously. Now before I never let go of my body and actually took pretty good care of my body. I exercised, I ate pretty well, I made sure to keep hydrated and listened to health fields as well. But I am talking about taking it to the next level. So I start a stretching/posture routine so the way I carry myself is different, I start martial arts, and I gain even more muscle. Not like I am super buff but I have gained 15+ pounds of muscle these last 4 months so I do have some muscle . Keep in mind tho, right now I have not yet taken action on these thoughts but it is interesting to have these thoughts. Perhaps one of the keys to having your dream reality is first develop a vessel that can support that dream reality. Dream reality = dream body.
- I am a lot less lustful now. Of course this has been a gradual progress but it is true.
- I am reaching the point where I can genuinely LOVE my imperfections. Although it is not complete, I do notice I am beginning to have some love for my imperfections . This is quite powerful and makes my well-being go up a lot.
Week 4 (Become Love)
- I have mentioned about being a lot less needy of external validation. However, recently I have no longer been SEEKING LOVE anymore. This sounds a little weird and emo but I will explain. When I say I no longer SEEK love anymore, it means that I no longer believe I need to change anything about myself in order to receive love. Rather I can just be as I am and ATTRACT love without doing anything. Now obviously the majority of me is still seeking loveā¦ but a small yet growing part of me is starting to effortlessly attract love. Becauseā¦ when your self-love raises, you become more loving towards yourself and the worldā¦ so in simple termsā¦ you slowly BECOME LOVEā¦ and love attracts love.
- Furthermoreā¦ I want to mention that when you seek āloveāā¦ I do not really think its actually love. Because at the end of the day, it is pretty superficial. For example, seeking love would be putting in a lot of work and effort into advancing your career just to marry a āhigh-classā girlā¦ but this usually ends up as a relationship where the man sees the woman as a ātrophyā and the woman sees the man as an āATM Machineāā¦ and all of us would agree that is not love.
- So theoreticallyā¦ increasing your self-loveā¦ will naturally and effortlessly allow you to attract and develop your dream friendships and romantic relationships. I say theoretically because before I started the self-love stack, I already had my dream/ideal friendships and I have yet to manifest my dream romantic relationship. Although I will say the self-love stack is clearly helping me make progress towards the dream romance as it has improved my tastes in people, helped me attract more love and improve my overall life. So we will see where this goes. And of course I will be sure to report it here if any updates happen!
- Once again I am going through a bad detox. Quantum love is giving me a bad emotional detox.
- Ok soā¦ once you have respect for your selfā¦ you will become a person that you respect and align your behaviours, decisions, habits and boundaries to the level of self-respect you have for yourself. This sounds obvious but there is more nuance to it. So if you love yourselfā¦ you will become a person that you love. Then you will align your behaviours, decisions, habits, patterns etc to match the level of self-love you have. So I am going to steal this quote from Guided Path To Wholeness, but to sum it up: when you want to be who you are, you will naturally become who you want to be.
- I have more integrity now. I guess Knight/warrior mindset is doing its job here but I also think increasing self-love has a part in it as well.
- I am more and more being able to speak and act how I want.
- Greater Confidence
- I realize that I have lots of patterns that actually REJECT love. Typing it out makes it seem so silly and weirdā¦ I mean why would one reject love? The thing that is even more strange is that the majority of people tend to reject lots of the love that comes their way as well. Not really sure why but I suppose once I am more aware I will update. The good thing is that now I am actually becoming aware of the patterns which is the first step of healing. In fact during lots of dates/romantic opportunities, the girl would show me love/flirt and I would just end up uncomfortable and shy despite actually LIKING them hahaha. Usually, the girl would just flirt with me again in a more aggressive/direct way and despite me actually liking it and liking the girlā¦ I always wound up shrunken in fear/anxietyā¦ that is so strange. I am guessing the girls from my past probably thought something like ādamn this guy is really not into me
ā but it really is not like that haha. I mean I guess it is too late to tell them now but I just have lots of pattern that reject love.
Real World Physical Benefits After Month 4
- Blocked a few people = better social circle
- Seeking less external validation
- Better awareness of people
- I do not let people talk down about me. I stand up for myself
- Less Lustful, my thoughts have changed
- Beginning to have love for my imperfections
- More accepting of my self
- Being less seeking of love but actually Attracting more love
- More integrity
- More confident
- Beginning to speak and act how I want.
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Month 5 (Feb 2026)
Week 1 (Trauma)
- To everyone reading thisā¦ here is a message/lesson to you. At some point in time, YOU HAVE TO CONFRONT YOUR SHADOW SELF. You can do it gently but sooner or later you need to integrate your shadow self, otherwise it will manifest into something that is not beneficial.
- I will give you an embarrassing example (please donāt judge me lmao). So one time a girl in my class approached me romantically and got very aggressive with her advances. The truth is I wanted to date her but due to self-sabotage/trauma I suppressed/repressed the desire and rejected her and āmoved forwardā in life. Well the summer passes and I see her once again on campus and all of a sudden an overwhelming desire to date her comes out of nowhere and I approach her and later text her to be my girlfriend to which I get brutally rejected lmaoā¦ after reflecting and doing workā¦ I realized that the root of that overwhelming desire is the suppressed desire which became part of my shadow self. but the point you guys can learn from thisā¦ is that if you repress something, the repression will integrate into the shadow self which will manifest as something most likely negative in your reality. A It seems to tend to be addictions (caused by overwhelming desire of something) or something. To be 100% honest, I am not really sure the mechanics with the shadow self work but this is what I am able to grasp with my beginner knowledge.
- So the solution to this is to accept and love ALL your desires/all parts of your self with no shame or guilt. Keep in mind you will likely have to come to terms with and accept some parts of yourself that heavily go against what is āacceptableā socially. Obviously much easier said than doneā¦. but if you donāt do itā¦ it will affect your life negatively anywaysā¦ so might as well get to it sooner or later lol.
- Okā¦ so a big question/concern I had when starting this self-love stack was along the lines of āWellā¦ self-love sounds great and allā¦ but what about my finances/career etc?ā. Well from my 5 month experienceā¦ I can tell you how self-love stack helps with this area in life. So for the first few monthsā¦. it is usually detox so the physical reality results may be a little dim. However after sometime you get past the large detox phase and start loving yourself. And deep self-love creates a deep feeling of self-abundance which will manifest into external reality as abundance. Abundance within will reflect outwards. So how has this looked for me? Well, for starters my money habits have improved a lot. I have organized accounts and track my spending + income as well as net worth etc. And I can say my net worth has been raising slowly and steadily these months. So hopefully this clarifies some stuff to some people because I know my past self would appreciate knowing how self-love would help with finance/abundance if at all lol.
Week 2 (Forgiveness)
- Yep I am the most abundant and financially wealthy I have been since a long time
- I have also deleted more of my SNS. So right now I only have discord, WhatsApp, which to be honest is more of a messenger app rather than SNS. The only SNS I use now is this forum which is mostly positive and educational anyways. Now the main concern I had which deleting SNS is something along the lines of āOh how will I get friends?!?!?!?!ā but no it is not like thatā¦. the people that are really aligned with you will just simply find another way to contact u that is not SNS. Think about itā¦ if a person is not willing to be āfriendsā with uā¦ because u are not on social mediaā¦. were you guys ever really friends in the first place? My answer is noā¦ and since deleting SNS this effect has taken place. All my friends that I thought were close to me and would adapt did adapt and have no problem messaging me on something elseā¦ mean while the āfriendsā (if you can call it that, not like they were badā¦ rather it was just not that deep) have no contact with me anymore. If anything, deleting SNS improves your life overall and I would even say it improves your social circle. It sounds paradoxical but it filters out all the loose friends and just keeps all your friends tight-knit so you can spend time with them.
- After forgivingā¦ you are able to give out love more freely. And for some reasonā¦ even if my love gets rejectedā¦ it is ok. Lots of people reject love out of fear including meā¦. but from an objective viewā¦ if you give out love freely WITHOUT overextending yourselfā¦ in the long run I do bet your life would be much better. You would be happier, more loving and have more fulfilled relationships. And keep in mindā¦ you never know what helping/loving someone right now might lead to down the road. It could lead to a job opportunity or an invite to a social gathering/club that improves your life or to a life-long relationship.
- I am much more authentic now. Tbh I was quite authentic up to 2 years ago but then bad things happened (I was the root cause but it still affected me) and I became a little less authentic. In factā¦ to shield myselfā¦ I become what people could call an āalpha/sigmaā male lmaooo. It is so embarrassing to write down but I am just telling the truth. Turns out my alpha/sigma male facade was just a shield that stemmed from past trauma because of I was afraid of getting hurt. Tbh at the start of this journey I did notice I started losing interest in alpha male stuff but I was not really sure why but now I know. I wonder if most/all āalphaā males are just putting up a front to hide their traumas/insecurity? Cuz I knew I was. Really I am just a shy and innocent boy haha
- What is weird tho is that now I get along better with other āalphaā males now. I would think someone like me who is not very āalphaā (I just am not really interested in those things lol) would be looked down upon by āalphaā males but that is not the case at all. Rather it seems like my energy makes them want to be friends with me lol! It seems that the energy I give off is not wanting to compete but rather just wanting to form a brotherhood based off love, support and respect and it seems āalphaā males feel this energy and immediately react positively to it.
- Of course keep in mind, in the āalphaā male culture there are actually lots of positive things that I will continue doing ā working out, exercising, self development etcā¦ so its not like it was all bad but mehā¦ I am over it lol.
- When you increase your self-loveā¦ you just effortlessly attract ALL things that make your life better. This can be information, education, guidance, people, opportunities, experiences, mindset changes etcā¦ you get the point. It sounds almost unbelievableā¦ but yea thats how it works. OFC you still have to put the physical hard work in as well.
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End Of Current Phase After 4.5 Months
Well as it saysā¦. I will stop listening to the self-love stack for now. This is a temporary change and the reason why is because an issue has popped out and requires my attention and energy for healing. Once this issue is healedā¦ the self-love stack will work better and life will be better as well. So lets take an overall look on how my life has changed with the self-love stack after 4.5 Months. I will just label important areas of my life and reflect on how it has changed. And I did listen to other fields but self-love played a vital role in this transformation.
How Life Has Changed In 4.5 Months
Relationships
My relationships have improved greatly. When you love yourselfā¦ you are able to love others Here is a list of changes I made
- I cut off ALL toxic/negative friends. Not even one remains.
- My relationships with my great friends are stronger
- My relationships with my family is stronger.
- While I do not have a romantic partner yet, I can 100% tell that self-love stack helped me get closer. It helped me become more loving, recognize toxic patterns and patterns that were a result of trauma.
So yea, self-love improves your relationships greatly. When I cut off certain people, I did not do it from a vibration of hate/anger either. I just sort of understood that they had a negative impact on my well-being and that is that.
Abundance
When I talk about abundance I am talking about abundance in all forms. I can say I am the most abundant I have been in a long long time.
- All my body-care routines are solid. (Hair care, skin care, teeth care etc)
- My closet/clothes are the best it has ever been. I donated all my clothes I do not wear/like anymore and even received a few nice pieces of clothing.
- I have attracted lots of awesome experiences (Cool nature walks, little adventures, exploration with friends etc)
- My patterns/behaviour reflect more of an abundance mindsetā¦ while I am not 100% on an abundance mindsetā¦ I am getting there.
Yesā¦ self-love makes you more abundant. Self-love increases your ability to attract good things in your life so ofc your abundance will rise.
Wealth
I am the wealthiest I have been in a long time.
- My net-worth more or less doubled
- I track my spending/income and my accounts
- I track my net worth
- I have a basic money system/basic money habits now.
Self-love made me realize lots of my spending habits were due to lack of self-love. To give examples
- Insecurity ā buying nice clothes to cover up insecurity
- Unhappiness ā buying something that gives temporary dopamine to fill that hole.
I am not against buying nice clothesā¦ but I was buying stuff to fill a holeā¦ and it never filled it up.
Furthermore, self-love made me take responsibility for my financials and while I am still growing and new to this, I do feel better than ever about my finances
Health
I am the healthiest I have been in a long time as well.
- I have great drinking habits now ā 99% of my liquid intake is only charged water and I make sure to get an abundant amount each day as well
- I have gained 20 pounds of mostly muscle. Fields helped as well but yea.
- I have picked up intermittent fasting which has helped
So self-love helped improve my health. When you love yourself moreā¦ you naturally take better care of yourself
Mental Health
My mental state is the best it has been in a long time as well. I mean for startersā¦
- I got back on meditating everyday for 20 minutes
- I journal very consistently now
- I practice gratitude although I am still a beginner
Mental health is extremely important and needs to be maintained just like physical health. Self-love makes you take better care of yourself so that means taking better care of your mental state.
Myself
I have changed greatly. I have transformed. My family thinks so as well. Everyone keeps asking me āWhen did you become such a man?āā¦ Really its not like that tho haha, I am not really interested in being a āmanā or whatever that meansā¦ its just that self-love makes you want to improve yourself and your life. Anyways to list a few changes
- My character/integrity is much better now
- I am much more confident.
- I am kinderā¦ in some situations where I would have insulted/teased someone, I actually refrained from doing so
Life
Life in general has changed a lot.
- I do not really seek much external validation now.
- My standards have raised.
- Much more focused and organized.
My life overall has improved greatly. My actions, routines, habits, behaviours all direct me towards a better life and that is amazing
Conclusion
So overallā¦ this stack has changed my life and myself. I have underwent a transformation. Not that I was in dire need of a transformation before as I still had it somewhat together but the self-love stack did help me grow greatly. Each phase is important as well.
This time I did not do much active work with it either so if active work was done with the stack then phewā¦ that might be growth on steroids.
Anywaysā¦ the point is, JAAJ self-love stack changes your life in all areas for the better.
Thank you for reading!
Thank you to JAAJ for making this!
Thanks to Dream and Sammy!
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Yo, I have started back on the self-love stack and I am on week 3 of my 2nd journey
So from a mix of increased self-love as well as listening to Vibration Of Transcendence, I came to the realization of comparison which I write about below
I think it could be helpful so yea.
Comparison and Its Effects
Ok so I realize now that comparing yourself to others is a negative habit caused by ego and lack of self-love. Think about itā¦ it really has no positive effect. Lets look at the 3 most common situations of comparison and see how it affects people. Furthermore, when you compare, your determination of someone being ābelowā or āaboveā you is purely based on perception and is not even real or valid anyways.
Case 1: Comparing yourself to someone you perceive as āaboveā you
So the process looks like this
- You see someone that you perceive is āabove youā
- You compare yourself to them
- As a result, self-esteem goes down and you feel worse about yourself
Comparing yourself to someone you think is better than you has no positive effect. In fact it has a negative effect because a lower self-esteem will result in a lower self-image which will worsen your actions. Also it just feels like trash.
Case 2: Comparing yourself to someone you perceive as āequalā to you
Here is the process
- You see someone that you perceive is āaround youā
- What you feel can vary here depending on your self-imageā¦ but the main effect is that you just strengthened the comparison mechanism within yourself.
This just adds another rep to the comparison mechanism which just strengthens the pathway which is a negative habit that can spiral out of control. You can think of it like junk foodā¦ eating it every now and then is completely fine but be mindful that it can quickly go over healthy limits. So I would still say case 2 is overall negative although not as bad as case 1 and case 3.
Case 3: Comparing yourself to someone you perceive as ābelowā you
Here is the process
- You see someone that you perceive is ābelowā you
- You get a superficial ego boost that is based on external sources as you believe you are ābetterā than someone else which makes you feel good about yourself
- When you get too many shallow ego boosts from any source, you become entitled and it leads to dickhead behaviour.
- Even worse, it serves as an excuse to NOT work on your real core issues because the ego boost will make you feel like āyou do not need itā (This a mechanism of the ego btwā¦ it will create situations/reasons to run away from your core issues)
So yeaā¦ case 3 is not much better than case 1.
So the solution to all of this is ego dissolution + increased self-love. Once your increase self-love your comparison mechanism will diminish.
We hear it all the time that the only person you should compare yourself to is yourselfā¦ but it is never explained so to me it just sounds cheesy. But this is the explanation and realization that I came to myself which helped me really realize lots of stuff, so I also hope it helps you guys out as well.
Stay strong, keep working on self love and thanks for reading.
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