I grew up as Catholic but then kinda found my own path into lets say a concoction of religions and then just felt like if i had a free card to participate in any one if feel at each time… or none.
Ive always had a theory from very young that i share every time i see it suitable (nothing real or confirmed just my perception about God I made up when i was a child)
When i hear people saying:
“I keep praying to God but i guess he doesnt listen to me” and things of that nature.
I say:
“Just imagine God is the CEO of a huge company, with thousands of employees, he/she could certainly do everything, but he/she chose to have a lot of different depts and within each dept there is a hierarchy with sub depts and each one is in charge of something”
“Do you try to reach the busy CEO where you work to ask for something? Is he/she the 1st option you try?
No right? You go to your immediate boss and ask, and if the boss does not help then you start escalating, or perhaps it definitely is the CEO the one you want to reach, but for him/her even tho he/she appreciates all the employees, you are relatively unknown… unless of course you have done so much good for the company you have gained merits to stand out from the crowd. Otherwise an email from you or a call more than likely would not be answered”. You then go through all the bosses by levels until they get through for you.
There is something i have experienced myself and that i do think is real (in my reality) there is a moment, perhaps what feels like a blink of an eye, seconds of magic where I feel God’s eyes or whatever I believe him/her to be are on me, and i know that i gotta take advantage of that small moment to connect and talk to him because at that moment he listens to me fully. I ask and i get the answer on what to do, to get or solve x y z. And then his eyes move to the next one…
If i do what i have to then ill get what i want, if i dont or i mess up… i have to wait a whole cycle of him/her watching around until the eyes find me again.
Sadly i had felt that divine infinite connection that i know is with the all only like 3 or 4 times in my life. It always happened around 5am. Ive tried so many times in so many ways to be in that space with It/Him/Her alone again, ive tried to follow all i did on those occasions the focus was on me to not avail… nothing has ever felt compared to what ive felt in those moments, closest time was when i first played The Light of Savitur, but still it wasnt the same.
I feel like a teen in love typing this: Crown of the Blessed is starting to feel like that!! Like if a path was developing a shimmering light building and strengthening from my crown to “IT” everything is different in that space. like if i had been given the personal phone number of that CEO, a hallway straight up to “IT”
I have not dialed yet, i feel shy, child like nervous that my exciment would make me clumsy and i would not know what to say the moment i hear he/she/it has answered.
But its there. Its very much there getting stronger as the days pass,while im just here pondering how those convos will manifest and when it will happen.
If you have reached this far… i hope you find that hallway and i hope you get this audio.
#infinitegratitude