Haha, this is all too true. I sometimes find that I waste a lot of my energy writing my long posts. But I do it for the 1 or 2 people who read. I read your post and I agree. This is is all indeed an illusion. But the grandest part of the illusion truly is: that you are separate from all this. This is not so at all. You, me, everyone and everything else are one being. It is undeniable.
I have had that awakening experience a number of times now. Becoming one with everything. It is at first met with aversion because well, to be one with everything is to accept that I am one with all that is evil, destructive and horrible in the world. It is to accept that all such things have their place and that I am also all of those people who intend harm on others. Who intend to divide us more. All such things are the other side of divinity that we all reject. And to reject it disconnects us from the source. It is unfortunate that this is how it is but it is so.
For good reason of course. How could one accept such things? Butā¦ I let myself go anyways. I let myself go into the void and I felt so much pain from the collective. It was so dense. Like a heavy black cloud. But I learned to that heavy discomfort and accepted it all as is and let go. And all of it just dissipated and my consciousness expanded until love illuminated every part of my being.
I awoke as the I in everything. In you, in me, in the ground, in the sky. It is the most freeing form of being. I am infinity and infinity is me. Infinity is every possiblity and I realize more and more, that it can only be accessed if you accept every possiblity. You canāt experience oneness if you do not accept that which you reject.
I accept all of me, every flaw, every memory. I accept that others do not or will not accept me. I accept the worst possible outcomes in the future. I accept all the hate, all the ignorance, all the division in the world. I accept the unaccepted all that is rejected, through and through.
For in me being at peace with it all, allows me to fully focus on the things I prefer. It allows me to fully focus my infinite potential onto love. Onto unity. Onto saying the kinds of things or performing the kinds of actions that lead to most peace in all the people around me. Peace with all existence allows me to be bring peace to others. For whatever I am in opposition to, will repress my flow and be a weight against my willpower. If i am not in opposition to anything, then my flow will go wherever I intend it to go.
It was a beautiful experience and I fully embraced and found the power in surrender. I am not special. I am you. You are also me. What enables me to tap into the source, is in you too. Itās just are you willing to let go of everything? Are you willing to accept everything? Are you willing to acknowledge you are all that you hate & reject? That is the hard part. But if you are willing to, youāll awaken the universe within you.
I still feel the allness but when I return to the outside world, I naturally attune to a more manageable state. I cannot be everyoneās mirror in such a big city. It would be too much for me and for others.
Oh, I had many more realizations and I luckily wrote them alll. But it is a dense amount of content and I know once I post it here, only 1 or 2 would read. I accept that too and will still do so happily. I just wanted to let out some of these thoughts right now at the very least. Iāve been holding onto this for a few days and I really wished to share it. And share thatā¦
I sincerely love every single one of you. I recognize the me in you, the you and me. I send you my heart. I send you all the gratitude in the world for existing. I know some of you are hurting oh so much and if you could only send me your pain, i would gladly weather it with love. We will make it through these dark times together. If we donāt, thatās fine as well. We are eternal and will have an infinite amount of times to get āitā right. But letās give it our all. In the name of love, as a collective, there is little to nothing we canāt do.