What would you do if you were me?

Ask for Advice
#1

I am making this post as I know there are many individuals here that might be able to help as they might have had similar journeys or life aspects in their past. I also decided to summarize it in points as this post was huge.

Also I want to make something clear. I am not complaining about my life. I do feel bad and want to improve it but I am not playing the victim. I understand that most people have difficult lives and are way more difficult than mine. This doesn’t change the fact that I feel bad, sad and want to feel happy and at peace.

To sum it up:

  • traumatized in the past (emotionally), enough to hurt self-worth, be beta, full of fears and health issues which influence daily life.

  • Have and had a lot of desires which always let go and choose acceptance as they cannot be manifested/come to reality anyway

  • Being overwhelmed daily which affects all areas of life, social, romantic relationship, work.

  • Day to day there is sadness, depression, regrets and the constant question of why because of the suffering

  • daily urge to improve and seek happiness and peace which leads to stress, anxiety, sadness

  • Ended up procrastinating daily and feeling overwhelmed when trying to do anything or advance on anything (new skills, business/career)

  • Any healing practice ends up being too much even to make a small change/progress. Ending up being a very slow process of improvement and more being a slow torture as by taking care of one thing in like 3-6 months, another five such things come to the surface in that period.

  • Daily practices and things that will make life better in terms of suffering. For example doing certain physical exercises, practices or taking supplements just to know that I won’t feel so much physical pain or suffering (mental-emotional) that day.

I am not sure what I am after as a reply to this. I am not making this post for suggestions on which audios to listen to. I mean if there is anything you think it will help please share. But today for example I played ego dissolution once and I believe my extra overwhelm is from that.

I am more interested in what someone else in my case would do. Something that would cause transformation. I know if I don’t do anything I will be the same “tomorrow” so I have been thinking drastic things that will at least… “rock the boat”. I am considering a water fasting as it will help mentally- emotionally as well but I am not sure I am capable because of physical issues to make it even more than three days. I started the star meditation practice for some days now.

The general theme for me right now is being stuck because of fears, addictions, procrastination and whenever I try to work on my issues it becomes so difficult mentally, emotionally and getting so much overwhelmed as I am already overwhelmed in my daily life. It just makes me feel so much suffering and disables me that much. I just want to be alone in a room and speak to no one and this is difficult as I am in a romantic relationship.

Again I don’t know why I posted this and what to expect. I just feel desperate and I am opening up and asking for help.

Thank you for reading. Thank you for being here.

11 Likes
#2

I know how you feel. Because from the post itself or looks like myself in a way😅 but I come to acceptance and just live through it. It is hard. Sometime we want to move forward but so many obstacles facing our path.

But that’s the challenge of it. Just accept it. And knowing things will be better at some point. We all will eventually. It’s just some people are more slower at receiving their goods than other. But in the end. You will get the goods. Just stay strong. Things will get better

2 Likes
#4

As I read your honest sharing here, the first thing that forcefully jumped into my mind is a suggestion that you find an understanding.and supportive, live (and in-person, preferably) partner on your healing journey. A few of these issues you’ve mentioned are extremely difficult to tackle on one’s own (let alone, a combination of.them), where a partner-in-healing (be it a support group or an individual) can really make a difference, especially when you feel you’re too (whatever) to go on.

2 Likes
#5

Whats up human? :sunglasses:

Before you do anything else, listen to this, followed bythis.
What I want you to do is, besides listening to these loudly, is to feel into the feel of the music.
Listen multiple times if you feel like, then read on.

Now, whats gonna happen is, you will shift your perspective in such a way to allow space for change to happen. At the moment, you are still stuck in this self-reinforcing cycle, hence you need mental space first. Ideal candidates in terms of techniques for this are any deep breathing practice (like the star exercise you mentioned you are doing), pranayama, wim hof method, etc. The goal is simple with these: Gain even the slightest feeling of mental clarity. The ideal field I recommend here is shamanic medicine blend.

Your waters are really muddy at the moment, thats why its difficult for light to shine through.

Now that you have “tasted” even the slightest hint of mental freedom, you will reinforce that with a single daily habit: exercise. I know, I know, you won’t wanna do it, but even 5-10 minutes is enough. Just that if you do 5 minutes a day, I really want you to sweat afterwards, you need to have your heart pumping blood and you need to feel it. You could do more, but for now I actually don’t recommend it, because you don’t wanna overwhelm yourself. After about a week you will notice a hint of accomplishment (very important!).

The cloudy skies are clearing up a bit.

Now that you have daily access to mental clarity and a feeling of accomplishment, you wanna amplify that with the most in-your-face thing one can do: cold showers. Yes, yes, you will resist it, for sure. But the good thing is, you can easily start first with only your hands and feet, for instance, and only for 10-20 seconds. Upgrade yourself over the following days by getting the whole body under the cold water and increase your time to 1-2 minutes each time.

Taking on this momentum, try to use abundance mindset and new perspective fields. Get those new neural pathways built in a wholesome way.

This is the right moment to implement a meditation routine. It might have been to tough to begin with before, but now that you are prepared you can do it. 15 minutes a day, longer if you feel like, gradually increase to 20-30 minutes. At first you will think its absolutely useless to do, until after about 2 weeks in, you are acknowledging noticeably more moments throughout the day in which you feel serenely calm and in control.

In control!

Read that again! Read it three times, 10 times! Shout it out! IN CONTROL!

From here, you already begin to not being able to recognise your past self. Since you actually feel in control now, suddenly possibilities open up and everything seems easier to be tackled.

At this point, you can introduce your own habits, follow your own interests and passions. This is the moment to let creativity come in. It is not required to paint a masterpiece in order to be creative. You could simply change the recipe of the meal tomorrow, or invent your own recipes, for example.

There is no turning back from here. This is the growth mindset.
And this is just the beginning.

8 Likes
#6

→ JAAJ’s Self Love Stack

2 Likes
#7

I’m sorry to hear you’re so stuck and struggling with so many things. Brave of you to share this that is often the first step in healing. The only tip I can give you as I went through something like this is that it didn’t heal until I had enough of being like that. But then I really drew a line that I refuse to be this version of myself.
Take small steps and don’t be hard on yourself, reward yourself when you have overcome a certain obstacle even for a day. Remember what worked and adjust if the same thing no longer work.
But the most important step for me was once again that I had had enough. (years of experience not had enough of it) :slightly_smiling_face:
I hope you find strength and realize you are worth of being the best version of you and have more beautiful moments in your life. One more important thing no-one is going to solve this you have to do it yourself others just there to remind you, give you tips and support you in this journey. Wish you all the best. :muscle: :four_leaf_clover:

4 Likes
#8

Thanks everyone for your replies. I will take time off, take time to reflect, regroup and come back.

Means a lot to me that you all took time to feel my situation even if you didn’t write anything. But especially the ones with these great insights, thank you :heart: :pray: :relaxed:

3 Likes
#9

I don’t know what you should do specifically or what I would do if I was you, but try to cleanse yourself, remove some of the negative energies and take some time to have little pleasures.

It takes strength to open up, that you did it shows that you are already on the path to improvement.

It’s normal to feel walls around you, the unknown, the misunderstood and uncertain, there is a lot of darkness and pain.

The world and life extends beyond your limits, beyond your experience. It doesn’t have to stay the same. Life has rules that you can use to your advantage and they will work for you here and beyond. In the known and the unknown, in light and darkness. It will take a lot of faith to follow them beyond your vicinity.

Fix one issue at a time, the ones that truly bother you the most. You will feel lighter. Because you cannot change everything at the same time, you need to prioritise… but you will get there.

It is equally important to learn to be happy as it is to change your life and environment to a happy one. It is not all in your head.

However you go about it, you will notice what works and what doesn’t, overtime you will see the overall direction you are on and it will become easier.
Remember that results are not linear, it can take a lot of work to suddenly see a shift in your reality. You don’t know how close you are and how good it can be.

Good luck morph :four_leaf_clover:

It can seem vague, but you cannot copy people’s actions only their methods.

5 Likes
#10

PS:

Keep in mind that most of the “issues” that one is going through are a manifestation of negative beliefs and programs running in the the subconscious mind.

Which means you are actually not “your life” and “your issues”. These are just a materialized representation of your subconcious beliefs and manifestations. Our lives are literally 95 to 99% controlled and manifested by the subconscious mind. And the actual you is just consciousness acting as an observer and decision maker.

Which also means that no conscious method will lead to major changes unless these issues are also addressed on a core subconscious mind beliefs level.

→ Does anyone know how to reprogram the subconscious effectively?

1 Like