On a scale of 1 to 10, how do you feel about where you are in your spiritual journey? Have you reached where you wanted to be, or are you still figuring it out?
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Right now, I’d say I am at about a 7.3.
For a guy who is about to turn 33 in about a month, I’ve had quite a journey so far. So many peaks and valleys. Some intense storms along the way that should have wiped me out but I’m still here. I sometimes wonder if it’ll always be like this. The more I grow, the harder the tests become. I know I came here to expand myself but… geez man lol.
That said, thinking back on the journey… I started out with -30% confidence, with soooooooo many limiting beliefs, inability to connect with many people, zero ability to meditate, zero understanding of what I am underneath… Just a lost and confused boy.
Looking at me now, I’ve become someone I love existing as. I have the kind of resilience and confidence that I always dreamed of having. And man, being able to focus on something for 10 minutes without my mind drift off feels like a superpower. That was the most impossible thing for a long time. And man, being able to experience universal consciousness a handful of times completely changed who I am and how I see & experience the world.
I also had no idea that working enlightenedstates/sapienmed could be such a journey in itself. Learned all too much about myself and life here. Would constantly be surprised by how much of what I learned here carried out into real life.
That said, I feel like I’m starting over with enlightenedstates but at the same time, I’m really not. The past still carries on in its own way. Yet much of what was here and made this place what it was, is kinda gone. And I seem to have lost a friend.
In my personal life, I haven’t been as close and connected to the people that love me. I could be a better son and check up on my parents more often.
I think so much about the world and what I can do to help it, that I forget about my own personal world. Like when’s the last time I checked up on my sister? I do very little enjoyable things these days. Just grind all the time and it’s taxing. Spiritual journey should be fun (most of the time at least). And I’m not having fun these days.
And I’m still not quite where I want to be career/lifestyle wise. Yes, that’s a part of the spiritual journey. What you do and put out in the world is your souls output. I’m not as consistent as I should be.
So yeah, that’s where I’m at and why I think I land on 7.3.
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Thanks for sharing this. I am still figuring things out. I really hope I can figure it out.
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