Seems like you have a back story and some deep personal stuff being triggered. It’s just a vague yet useful term, it doesn’t define every inch of someone’s life.
Insecure people like the comfort of labels and arbitrary metrics to judge others and compare themselves. They’ll take any adjectif and make it a race. It’s okay… We won’t reject all words just because some don’t like it
About the loser and winner thing, it’s up to you to decide for yourself, but people are still going to judge you no matter what, so get used to it.
Hmmm… Hmmm…
It’s okay to masturbate, I admit having done it at least once in my life lol and not wanting to have sex is also okay.
But unless you use it as an occult type of meditation, sex with a partner is better. In some way, deep down, in the depth of your mind, you know masturbation is a sign of lack. Competition for partners to procreate was a must and it has guided our evolutions. Not having a partner had many downsides in the tribe and internal life.
Next time you read beta, think subordinate and alpha: leader (apparently you don’t have a problem with those terms). That’s all. Now there are many advantages to being a leader including ressources and sexual partners. That’s what most people want and try to get, that’s also how they compare themselves and it turns into a competition. Competitions have winner and losers. You can ignore it, but this primitive wiring is not going away anytime soon.