We’ll see, I pretty much assumed I would feel the feelings I usually feel when I’m describing them to myself while feeling them spontaniously. I’m almost 40, been on the journey of more and more embodiment for 15 years, and yet I still have preconceived notions of what each word will produce in me. And I really know better than that, but let’s just do the beginners mind thing and pretend I know nothing. Which is actually truer now than it used to be. At least, I’m more willing to admit to that now I’m further along on my path.
I’ve not had any opportunities to work the task today, both my children are home and fully active. I am hoping that tomorrow I will be afforded some time to focus. I actually felt really amazing yesterday after only getting enough time to do the apathy states. But today I have been in one of the worst spaces, and actually found myself saying things like ‘i don’t care’, ‘i can’t do this’ ‘i give up’ I kid you not. What on earth could account for this? Anyway, I really appreciate the support and will DM you the now, this is the sort of thing that makes it worth the money, such dedicated help.
Definitely did, felt it in my face like it wanted to explode the first time I activated it. Though I’m having bad feelings about my phone, using it is really not my preference and that dampens it from the inside. Hard copy should be with me by tomorrow, post willing. It’ll work out somehow, I’m not kidding that this is one of my darkest times in the last decade, so there’s a lot of shit and garbage to sift through. Bleh.