No idea what to do with my life

Ask for Advice
#1

Hey guys. I’ll keep it as short as i possibly can and want to start off with expressing gratitude to @El_Capitan_Nemo for the audios and his service to all & to all the members of this community for helping each other.
Im turning 25 on 1st july. I’ve always been the shy introverted kid. I rarely made friends or socialised. Intelligent and smart when i wanted to, lost interest in academics in 9th grade. Suffered a lot of physical, mental & emotional trauma since childhood but somehow was able to look at the bright side and still believe in light side of the world.
In 9th standard, i found football one day and loved the game and it served as my escape. I was extremely good at it. To the point, many said that i would easily make it as a pro at a high level. I’ve had invitation from a top club also but an injury blocked the opportunity. And then covid came, got it 2-3 times. Health was wrecked, but thanks to sapien all good now but gaining strength is still a struggle, body adapting to exercise much much slower.
My parents were always supportive of my pursuit but rarely were when the time came, but i never minded cuz i understood that my father was frustrated because of his business. He comes from a lower middle class family. Came to the big city as a 14 year old alone with 0 contacts. Built an empire, became a millionaire ( both in inr and usd) and since 2007, we are struggling. Sometimes hand to mouth. But still grateful of what we have. And now due to covid and financial issues. My dream of becoming a pro in EU is close to dying, if not already dead. And during covid, my grandfather died, my relationship of 6 years was broken off due to external circumstance from her family. We’ve met sometimes secretively after to see if we can find a solution. All this has caused a ton of stress resulting to many health issues.
My health is quite improved now. But i have no idea what to do with my life cuz I’ve sacrificed everything i had just to achieve the goal of playing football. I swear i gave everything i had, my body, mind, heart, social life, my youth, my teenage years. Everything. Tons of mental & emotional anguish inside. Tons of negative thoughts all of a sudden out of nowhere and when i come into awareness of them, im like “ wtf, this isnt how i think of myself” Im unable to think or see and feel extremely hopeless for my future . that i would just be struggling and poor for the rest of my life ( could it be the release of wealth and abundance audios?). Idk guys. With all this. I seem to be ok on the surface and unable to express what is going on inside. I also want to mention that due to the grand success and recognition of my father, two of our relatives got quite jealous and did black magic ( the term used irl is different and most arent aware of that so. Basically they offer sacrifice to deities and spirits to do the dirty work) but its okay now in that regard. Sorry for the long post but couldn’t help it. All and each advice is welcomed.Also please keep in mind that i cannot afford the premium fields as i have no source of income. So just free audios and advices. I only have the ashta lakshmi one. And i dont like asking this and never thought the day would come but if any of you would like to donate an audio to me in regards to my or my family situation. Or just a single payer. I would be deeply grateful. Nonetheless im grateful to sapien and you all. God bless you and may the universe fill all areas of your life with avalanches of abundance.

EDIT : thank you everyone :slight_smile:

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#2

If nothing works out in the outside world and you are challenged, this can be an invitation to go inward so to speak,. To the person and the ego all this past and present misfortune and loss can feel like a huge disappointment but in reality it is a hidden blessing. Perhaps the time has come to live the ultimate truth and surrender to the divine. It’s your move! Make something beautiful out of it!

Om Namah Shivaya :white_heart:

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#3

To be honest bro, I’ve been feeling this. I’ve had communication with the divine along time ago. But this time I’m not able how to go inwards man. Im just unable to think. But your comment definitely resonates to what i am feeling for some time. It feels like you’ve spoken about what I’ve been feeling for some time. Do you have any advice? Maybe the divine is speaking is speaking through you. Today only i had this feeling to pick up the boo” autobiography of a yogi” which was laying in my cupboard half read.
Om Namah Shivaya. Jai Bajrang bali

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#4

It’s not really an action. It’s a kriya. Just be the neutral observer of everything that happens…

I don’t know if you are in india at the moment and which deity resonates deeply with you but i would invoke one by reciting his name and mantra and i would also do a mantra to awaken the inner guide so he can live through you. Most of us are cut off from our inner guidance. If you are in the presence of a temple that resonates with you, i would suggest to visit often and ask for guidance and say you are prepared to allow life to flow through and surrender. I think it’s importance you give permission to life or a deity or the consciousness to take over. That is if you want to live the ultimate truth.

For example i shubhamthakur born … allow the … to take over and surrender to …

#5

Hi Shubham,

I had gone through the phase you are going through or I can say even worse than it near about 16 years ago.
At that time there was no such helping hand like Sapien Medicine nor full-fledged internet access. Lots of suicidal thought used to come in my mind however I came out of that situation by unknowingly using law of attraction.
Remember whatever you feel that you attract so it is important to feel happy to attract happiness in our lives.
What I did was bit funny as even though there used be suicidal thoughts in my mind I did not have courage to do that so.
So I decided to live like a dead body, the body which does not have soul. Once soul leaves the body, body does not feel any pain. So then I started to strictly monitor my thoughts & when any painful emotion or thought used to come up I used to say to myself as I am a dead I don’t feel any pain & I used to discard painful emotions or thoughts however it was not decided to discard thoughts or emotions of joy or happiness so after some time what happened is that I started to get more n more opportunities & within a 6 month or a year my life came on a track.
Also I came to know about emotional freedom technique ( EFT) it is also a very powerful tool to manifest anything provided consistency is required. You can find n number of videos on YouTube for it.
And try to listen Subconscious limiting belief remover & Love, Gratitude and appreciation field as much as you can also reduce number of other morphic fields to faster results.
At last please go through the articles in the links given below.

Jai Shree Ram, Har Har Mahadev

1 Like
#6

so meditate/awareness?

I am in India and for the most part Hanuman ji. I’ve done 108 hanuman chalisa with sankalp in the past, and currently I do 3 recitations of hanuman chalisa twice a day and aditya hridayam stotram in the morning. and kali chalisa once as she is present in my mom and in our house. IK about bajrang baan but I don’t resonate with how hanuman ji is sort of forced in that. talking of temple, there is baba neem karori ashram I was going to visit with my family but somehow things were not working out and now monsoon has arrived here in north, so its not safe to go in the mountains rn.

#7

i have often wondered myself about how my dad and other people would have managed in the pre internet era and by wondering i have developed more appreciation for everyone who is out there providing for themselves and for their family. and wow your method is certainly quite unique and made me laugh a bit haha.
i am aware of manifestation and such. i have manifested multiple things in the past, from money to people to material things, experiences etc. But here is the thing, since my breakup and few other traumatic things in the last 2-3 years, i have become very fearful and anxious, working on that and the situation has improved, but im not able to balance my emotions. I’m a very very very very sensitive person, especially emotionally. I was very good at manifesting before, i would manifest things in front of people which they considered impossible to happen. anyways, thanks for your comment and I have read those articles before but i will again, maybe ill find something new.

Jai Shree Ram. Jai Bajrang Bali.

#8

I guess you lost the control over your mind.
Try eft & breathing through only left nostril.

      If you are injured hurt then 1st try to recover yourself then plan to think something big.
#9

yeah, I think i should listen to emotional release and resilience for a while

#10

Just explore what works best for you. For me chanting mantras and walking works best. I’m not someone who sits still for long periods of time. Seems you already have a kind of process…

I always try to keep my thoughts and actions focused on the divine

#11

Hmm. I was practicing karma yoga, not formally though. But couldn’t keep at it for long. Anyways, thanks for your comment!! It did resonate with me.

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#12

This is your life!

I feel it’s important that everyone finds out about life for themselves and what works best

It’s an important aspect of one’s path :pray:

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#13

If football is your life and living out of it as a player is no longer an option, why don’t you consider taking a course to become a coach? Or maybe a personal trainer/physiotherapist specialized in football preparation/injury prevention? Just food for thoughts :slight_smile:

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#14

Have you tried to check out your current dasha?

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#15

Divinely Incarnated NFT

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#16

If I were you, I’d do a round of emotional clearing. All clearing fields, all mental health fields, the alchemy series and intercession. And even “unrelated” fields like wisdom of the dying.

Just one round of everything, as you see fit. I’d finish this with negentropic fool.

And once you’re more clear, ego dissolution plus higher self connection. After that, pietersite energy. With pietersite, maybe you can also get a stone/pendant/whatever and either carry or experiment with it.

After all this, if all fails, then there is the explorer archetype. After connecting with the higher self, exploring would work…you’ll be guided. There is blessed/guided path too.

And SorcerySupreme hyssop cleanse and chiron reiki water could be useful for you at this point.

I’d also give a listen to the Sapient Wellness fields, and meditate with them all. Along with the mass meditation field…I’d actually use this one regularly and all throughout this process.

You probably know that fields like ojas and essence of mantras, faith, grace, etc fields can be useful.

So, take what resonates. But I think you do need some emotional clearing (grief, loss and loneliness is often forgotten, but there is an element of loss to most things that sadden us).

In my opinion, we choose our path at a certain point in our life (generally when we turn 33 y.o.)…so if football is all that has interested you until now, I’d keep at it.

Maybe you need some time off…but I think we all return to our path at that point I mention…so you may regret having done something for making a living when you could be working in what you love.

Good luck ^^

3 Likes
#17

I have thought about it but it didn’t interest me at all, id much rather build a business or online income and move to the mountains, we already have land there. although I’m coaching (free of cost) a high schooler who cannot afford the academy fee for about 3 months. he went from not playing a single match for 2 years to being selected for Nationals.

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#18

no, i haven’t. we have done a lot of pooja and rituals from various known pundits. and everybody keeps saying the same thing "Everything is good " :roll_eyes: . the last one even said to my parents “Sorry to say but your son won’t be doing a corporate job, he will go abroad and play sports " but rn. I don’t see how. I’m asking my deity for a sign every day and if I get a solid green light, god knows imma go ahead full steam. but I’m also at the age where I want to be making money man, helping my family, planning for the future, and stuff. I’m sure you understand. although I’ve heard multiple times that I have " gaj kesari yog” wondering when its gonna do something :joy:

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#19

" 250 " :sneezing_face:

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#20

:rofl:

Then let Shiva or … guide you

He probably already is :blush:

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