what is @Drift writting that takes him that long?
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Drugzss iszzs baad.
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Things are always good and bad.
Nothing else.
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whole forum coming here
âyou living in matrix bro, sub limits removalâ
âwow so itâs black and white all?â
âyou should be ashamed for telling thatâ
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you do them?
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Opinion is Shiva is the only God I ever resonated with or felt was real. Opinion.
Now, it seems I was wrong.
Another opinion is I resonate with Saraswati. TM mantras are Saraswati mantrasâŚI like the mantras Iâm supposed to do when Iâm older, not now, but whateverâŚthey were a sect anyway xD
Another opinion is if Kali doesnât kick your ass, then you can get into anything you want. You started the house by the roof so xD
And another opinion is Yoga Sutras of Pantajali and even Hatha Yoga Pradipika are good. Sri Aurobindo writings too. Those are my references but I have a list somwhere, of high consciousness books written by gurus.
The Cloud of Unknowing is one such bookâŚbut coming from a medieval christian mystic. But cool stuffâŚand easy to remember vs the sanskrit or hindi name of the other books xD
Also as a kid I read everything I could on yoga. Now I forgot cause of bad memory and stuff. Hinduism is massive, hard to understand. Youâre gonna have to take the jump.
I get you though. Many people actually feel the same. You can see it in any ashram. People know they followed instructions and were initiated and they are in more control of their life and themselvesâŚbut not quite understanding why yet.
The dissonance will stay there until you become the gruruji yknow.
NopeâŚcouldnât commit to anything right now. Besides Iâm using fieldsâŚit is already a lot as it isâŚdonât wanna mix more.
I have this conflict of rejecting deities and disliking them (for about a year) then I feel like they are welcoming again and I get interested in them (for about another year). And so goes my life.
Last time I was in bad sufferingâŚI donât think I felt any comfort coming from the gods and I relied on them cause I had nothing else then.
The problem is you canât rely in your own consciousness or awareness when youâre messedâŚyouâre stuck with your mind. So you need an external power. So being in good terms with deities is always good.
I think fields work every time, Dream did some alchemy or magick. So even if deities are testing you, at least we can alway use the yagnas and homans, etc.
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Only weed.
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weed good
instead of touching grass is smoking grass
good for lungs, it grounds them
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if field isnt smart you will be looking like Tarzan xD
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did you watch the show?
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you know she had some alien dna modsâŚit was Montauk come on
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Yeah I donât know her that well and I donât come from that background
But I still have a lot of respect for her (even conceptually).
At one point I suspected I was going through a kundalini awakening and I even âinvokedâ her and asked her to kindly not let me get f* up.
Well I come from a christian background and Iâve been sort of at odds with âGodâ.
I do perceive âgodsâ and such as âstepping stonesâ, as even Sadhguru would put it.
A higher consciousness/archetype that one can âaccessâ perhaps, to help in their journey.
Though ultimately, not âthe ultimate truthâ.
But letâs say⌠a more evolved aspect that one might âtap intoâ when needed (if deemed worthy perhaps). Not to be worshiped though, imo. Hence the internal dilemma. Fear of falling for dogma again. While at the same time, deities can be of help, as evolved aspects of⌠something something about us ultimately.
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ye
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people want to worship God because they experiences the grace
if you seen a God in your room right now the energy it will exude will make you instantly go and worship him.
Itâs not like you should first believe. Believing is a guide to knowledge not some kind of a habit that is the end goal.
Donât worry about it when time comes you will worship yourself. Because you will feel the blessings that God gave to you. Like opportunities that are bended for your own benefit or the life that you have.
Stuff happens in a lifetime of a human, being open minded isnât just to be accepted by some society or another human or whatever. Is to recieve what you were meant to be then continue that path to know more and more and more and more. Till of course you meet God too.
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Which, I thought of,
I read in a book on tantra something along the lines of âTo worship / bow to me is to recognize the God that is within me that is also within youâ â to recognize yourself, ultimately. TMI, but the connection I made at that time was in regards to lovemaking. And love, in general. Have not gotten to the âgeneralâ aspect yet.
But I sense that it ultimately leads to this â
And, as I have been doing much shadow work, it seems like much of the source of my âkarmaâ comes from, ultimately, not knowing / forgetting who/what I really am (which, being born on this plane tends to do (?))
There is this sense, that even my body reacts to, that I canât quite grasp yet, more like an intuition,
that ultimately
I am God
Nonetheless, seems like this is a conflict to be resolved: the god/deities one. Itâs, as @JAAJ would put it, a âcheat codeâ. Itâs just been weighting on my mind to not as easily accept it, though I perhaps should, as my âawakeningâ went hand in hand with realizing I grew up in a cult. Insert âwhen you see it youâll shit bricksâ meme. Sure, afterwards, itâs not hard to see how we all grow up / live in various type cults. It seems like such a slippery slope, to lose oneâs power⌠I sense it, the danger, the siren-like voices, the âdriveâ to renounce your Self in order to worship another âpowerâ
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I donât mean to worship youself, you are human. You yourself will worship God
ultimately there are many theories that we here to learn to become a universe on our own. Do I know that? not really, so I go with what I know. I felt the grace of the God itâs wonderful and of course you want to bow down to it. Itâs God.
So donât get me wrong,thatâs my belief and donât want to keep you back from exploring.But I think worshiping yourself is not good, not even bad. Not even worst. You will worship someone that has a fault, that didnât invent nor gravity nor nature nor light nor darkness nor anything. If all of these are within you is another story. But I worship the one that created all and most likely itâs not me because if it was me you are all f-ed up here xD
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I mean more towards the source/God that is expressing itself through me. Not in an ego-type way. More in an essence way
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yes yes that works
thing is that I donât even want to think about those stuff anymore
you know I started understand people that seem crazy to others when they tell about metaphysical stuff and all those. I understood completely that those are bullshit because they started believing something and the belief came to be their new reality. That reality is complete false. Complete complete. If not working, if not done and have structure to it, to be sustained by itself is false.
Like letâs say putting their own terms. Telling that one can achieve this or that without having any achievement to that. Like using terms from all kind of occult stuff when they are not even know what they doing, just reading stuff here and there. Like losing control over one self because of the obsession of being right.
All those understandable states that a human has, like always we are humans, canât really deny it, except if you stopped being a human after some point as I can predict.
So I would make a suggestion after those things I said. But I just wanted to put it out and you make your own decisions after that.
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As in,
in my current understanding/view
I am a branch of God
A nuance of its essence
Itâs in my veins.
Itâs an aspect of it.
Itâs a neural pathway in a larger brain
I am Divine.
Whether I recognize it or not.
And you are also Divine.
So when you meet someone that awakens Love into you, or a guru, or some enlightened being
Itâs simply mirroring to you
Yourself
That which you could not see
But
Yourself
Otherwise, you would not see it.
Even with stuff we donât like; shadows.
It seems like itâs all a mirror.
Some say that God is trying to find out about its own damn self through us.
Just as with drugs, really
Weâre reacting to THC because weâve got receptors to it.
Youâre (generally) reacting to stuff I say because there is something to it, deep inside you.
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