Rejection Therapy

General Discussion
#1

I came across this TED talk and I thought I share

you can find the playlist of each day he got rejected and just watching along is empowering tbh.

it would be awesome if some members here tackle this or present some challenges for others :slight_smile:

Rules

There is only one official rule to Rejection Therapy, which is to be rejected by another person at least once, every day. There are also stipulations as to what counts as a rejection and what does not:

  1. A rejection counts if you are out of your comfort zone
  2. A rejection counts if your request is denied
  3. At the time of rejection, the player, not the respondent, should be in a position of vulnerability. The player should be sensitive to the feelings of the person being asked.
Potential rejections

Reach out to a friend or family member who has shunned you
Ask a stranger to take your hat
Offer to pay for someone’s order
Smile at every person you walk past today
Ask your boss for a raise. If unemployed, ask for a job
Ask someone out on a date
Ask a stranger for change from a dollar
Ask for directions from a stranger
Invite someone you’ve never socialized with out to dinner
Say hello to three people at the grocery store
Sit beside a stranger strike up a conversation
Offer to help a stranger with their groceries
Try to make an enemy a friend
Ask someone if they believe in God
Ask someone their political affiliation
Ask for a sip of someone’s drink
Try to buy something that is not for sale. Do it in person
Confess to someone you lied to
Before purchasing something, ask for a discount
Ask for a stranger’s phone number
Request a free pass
Invite someone to your church or club
Show a stranger a photo of your cat (or dog, goldfish)
Ask a meat-eater to become vegan
At a restaurant, ask for something not on the menu
Ask to trade parking spots
Ask a stranger for a “high five”
Try to acquire a good or service by trade
Offer unsolicited advice
Ask to cut to the front of the queue
Ask a stranger to take a picture of you
“Borrow” a cup of sugar
Ask a friend to do your laundry
Call your credit card provider.
Ask to have your interest rate lowered
Introduce yourself to a stranger

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#2

Sounds like fun!

#3

Very interesting stuff

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#4

image

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#5

Why not simply listen to Unbreakable, Extreme Confidence, Amygdala Healing and Archetype of Parental Love? :slight_smile:

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#6

I’m happy to give out rejections, if anyone needs one, shoot me a msg :smirk::wink:
:joy:

(Sry Zen I couldn’t help myself)

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#7

Ok I watched it. That’s messed up, like the tough love coaches bullying people.

I’m just gonna hurt myself again and again until I’m desensitized. Yeah, sounds like a good idea, totally legit, not fad psychology at all…

He goes there with that failure mindset of make a ton, one will be good.
Doesn’t look like he repressed his issue to me

Edit: after one year:

“I did it guys ! Now, I’m an expert at being rejected, it happens at least twice a day and I don’t even care :champagne:”

I guess if it was a sold more as “try to be social and assertive everyday” it might be ok. But then you’d still be wise about it instead of just hitting the wall on purpose

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#8

I Agree.

That’s like adding more trauma to existing trauma, in order to somehow be healed of all the trauma in the end ?!?!

WTF!

This dude (Jia Jiang) needs to go in therapy himself and TED needs to be sued :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

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#9

Yeah, I don’t want to go on another rant on that “negative male energy” where they go and create all type of schemes to hide their vulnerabilities and end up even worst.

But he should get a shrink or at least not advertise that stuff.
We all have vulnerabilities and guys are particularly sensitive to these “act don’t feel” solutions.

Just sit down an process instead of running around doing more and more non sense

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#10

If you have a hard break up, rejection or got fired.

Sit down and reflect on it, learn the lessons, don’t just run into another relationship or situation mindlessly.

Guys need mommy’s love. Or they go into repressed macho vibe and then you need to talk them out with even more love and patience to make them open up. It’s even less manly in the long run.

Looks like they feel vulnerable because they can’t control, so they go and try to control the uncontrollable by sabotaging themselves by trying 10x harder. It’s not natural, that’s not how you build trust, relationships.

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#11

I think its important to be able to work through rejection and go out there to embrace being vulnerable to be rejected is also important.

Running away before even trying is also detrimental for self development, taking risks and going out of the comfort zone is what builds resilience when we encounter rejection. Until we see it as part of life and move on.

But this exercise i do agree fully with Phillip going too far to just be able to turn into a wall lol

At least is how i see it

6 Likes
#12

Yep, I wrote about this there:

I disagree.
This is the same as this whole “work harder” propaganda.
One does not become fearless by taking risks and other forms of “exposure therapy”. All that this does is to create an layer of coping strategy where the original problem is pushed further down into the unconscious.

The solution to rejection, being immune to rejectione etc. is always in having the right installed beliefs in your subconscious mind.

Most issues are not to be solved with ‘action, doing, trying and exposure’ but with repgrogramming the subconscious mind.

Most people don’t know that they have a subconscious mind, and those who do, fail to acknowledge that the subconscious mind controls 98% of their life.

People feel guilty about this all the time and blame themselves for “not taking action” – which actually reinforces the whole problem and the low self-esteem – and then even further fueled by the mainstream propaganda that “you need to take action and face your fears or you are loser”.

What people don’t see is that in almost all cases, it is the subconscious mind that makes them run away and sabotages their actions, because it has a program/belief running in it that this is how it keeps the person SAFE.

The solution to end this self-sabotage is then to reprogram the definition of what is considered “safe” by the subconsicous mind.

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#13

Ooops i was just going to share this video with a friend who got scared when asking a lady her number. What advice should i give him instead?

#14

If he goes on semen retention mode, then after 4-6 weeks he should have zero social anxiety, even without fields.

Otherwise:

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#15

so how does going on semen retention magically does this?

the irony

semen retention is a bunch of bs, it only helps with self control and builds discipline sort of like meditation but meditating has its own benefits too, semen retention alone wouldn’t help in the slightest when approaching women.

and this is your ego.

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#16

on it :slight_smile:

#17

Disclaimer: I don’t believe in nofap unless you transmute and do some magic with that energy (I guess) and we have jing and ojas anyway if you worried about that.
It’s still an impressive feat of self-control.

Now, based on my experience when you are horny like a maniac and you just want to stick it in somewhere, rejection means nothing. You want her body so much, the consequences fly way over your head. After 1.5 month, it’s like having a drug withdrawal, you’d do anything for a fix.
Making a move is easy in that situation, your P is in control.
In fact it’s hard not to make a move at that point.

Better to fix the real issues and learn to have relationships. That trick will only take you so far, you still have no skills, maturity or confidence.

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#18

me?

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#19

Nah, I’m agreeing with you. It’s a general “you”.

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#20

it feels like type of fearless from a psychopathic.

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