My visualization is really good. But you are on another level creating images on people’s mind through your writing.
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And yet the flow is off.
Chronologically the second paragraph should be first. Or the last sentence of the first paragraph should go up and connect with the introduction.
Then the unfolding is rugged, try and read it, it’s bumpy. It drops and goes back up, the sentences should be balanced with each other.
It requires too much engagement.
Also too many words and not specific enough, I could’ve said more with less. The words should be more closely associated with the theme, without the readers having to “micro-think” to adjust. The concept could have been emphasized more to reinforce the picture before switching to the next motion. Like how much effort for how much unfolding. Low ROI
Every sentences feels off, as if the writer added more themes. Feels like a draft 
But hey, I go with the flow
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The active engagement and deliberateness are what set the style apart. The curious readers have to do the active work, but the results last a while. The themes are dispersed but still coherent. The bits and pieces create a full vivid picture.
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That’s another way to see it 
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eto… Hello im charity 
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sexted
I think I know why.
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Why?
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Read what you wrote again
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Lol it’s a joke, wasn’t funny was it?
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LMAO 
This is great 
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Thought it was a fingerslip lol.
Still funny tho
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I imagined the whole ordeal. Weird, weird mind-scape.
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Try sending a video. He will answer that way 
and if your not too busy u can post it here 
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You what?
Is that a typo or you really meant it?
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Am I too old fashioned or what?
But i dont find that “supposedly” joke funny at all.
Are you guys ok at home?
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It is weird GEN Z humour
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I love it.
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Well i definitely find it interesting to say the least lol
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