In a prize fight? If I can get lucky landing a hard shot on the inside where I put my body into it
I think I can lay out a lot of people out there
I remember when I first moved in a boxing gym in Oakland, the coach kinda treated me like shit
Till I sparred his āgolden boyā son lol (he had 2, I sparred the older one)
It was my first week back boxing so I knew I was gonna get lit up
I remember this boy (lol he was like 27 I was 19), was throwing everything hard
I remember one hook he threw
I looked at it smiled and didnāt dodge it
I let it land and then looked at his father smiling, probably bleeding from my nose too
But I felt this way the whole time, just letting this guy go all out while I refuse to hurt him
The whole gym knew I can crack, cuz they heard me light up a bag and there wasnāt not one heavy weight that can light a bag like I could, I was only like 170
Right after sparring him, I did some pad work with his father (the coach was called Lightning Lopez, I lived in the Lightning Lopez boxing gym) and he knew my punches crack
He told me the reason his son mustāve sparred like that was cuz he was intimidated by my punches
The thing with me is that, I donāt spar hard but my hands are real heavy so it lands as so
The morning after (or so)
The same mean main coach⦠Was talking about āheyy Champpp ā
He completely 180° his attitude towards me
Definitely viewed me as a prodegy
I used to want to be world champion at every weight division going up to heavy weight (all the way down from super middle weight or light heavyweight) and knock out people like Wilder and fury, just whoever talking really
And I knew I didnāt need to be 6 foot 7 inches tall to do it
Just needed my fist on their face
I quit boxing when I was in that gym after I got attacked by a homeless(?) persons pitbull on Alameda, next to Oakland when I was going to a 24 hour fitness to shower (the boxing gym I lived at didnāt have a shower only a bathroom)
So I was 19 right?..
2 years after, with 2 years of bodybuilding and completely transformed body, I still felt like I could quit bodybuilding, get fully fledged in boxing again and become the greatest boxer ever
It didnāt leave my mind
I kept feeling it
I would see whoād be talking online, whatever champion, and I would think I could destroy all these guys if I pursue it⦠but nahhhā¦
So I bottled this in
So with this in me, yes, I believe I can hang sparring light heavyweights - cruiser weights - heavy weights after like 4 months of good training ā¦
But professional prize fighting? I gotta stay awake and land something proper lol
And Saturday morning they woke me up (I was living in this hall way area between an office and stairs, I had an air mattress there and my luggage where I kept my clothes)
And immediatelyā¦
āLetās go, time to sparā
I thought that was crazy lol
No food no water not even brushing my teeth just going to spar haha
My breakfast where punch sandwiches lol
Imagine waking up and the first thing you need to do is ālightā fighting?
Patience is a parent, heating system, cooling system, comfort pillow, summer vacation all combined
YES SIRRR
You know, I never took it seriously enough (energy in the body) Just thought that itās⦠something very distant, something thatās very abstract or occurring way way later in a way I would never understand anyway but after seeing how literally muscles develop after one single workout Iām starting to take everything seriously and as instant thing itās like⦠I have a closed up look now getting there
Ah itās okay donāt worry,
I sparred once with my MMA friend the other month, itās all good, I hang the gloves, I retire from physical combat of any kind except self defense if ever needed
Imma still crack at these bags and make em wish they werenāt ever bags!
lol
I will do stuff for reflexes and all, just donāt wanna get too physical with people no more not even sparring
And I think it works out for my brain development in the long run, donāt need to get punched in the face no more lol
What do you mean? Like when I would see them?
I would just feel like itās a tease of an opportunity I can take that I should just let slide
But back in the day?
I wanted to be the greatest boxer that people can look back on in the year 3000 and know for a fact that Iām the greatest, world champion was just a byproduct, I wanted to achieve it in dark and terrible ways
Because I felt that it could only be dark and terrible, I felt like the greatest should absolutely decimate all competition at the time, completely ending careers and more
Now I understand, the greatest, the true greatest, would be able to destroy any one and not do it, mercy them
Instead of being dark and terrible to a human even when they are willing to die for it too
Yeah I one fang really went in my wrist
Had some trouble closing the pinky and ring finger on my right hand
It was this hugeee dog
The hole would bleed whenever Iād throw punches
Even if I was only throwing punches with my left hand (this wound was on my right hand)
I quit because
In the time I was recovering, I had an understanding
That I could do something greater
That I could do something positive instead
That I could impact the world in a good way
With all this fire and belief I had in myself
I saw how my own belief was manifesting things for me in boxing (I truly felt like my power was epicly multiplying, I felt like I could crack legendarily)
Boxings greatest gift to me was the mindset
I thought I was manifesting things at the time with my own self belief and push
My main coach, my old coach
From Miamiā¦
I used to call him father at times by accident
I used to feel like I let him down
I knew he believed in me
When the gym would close heād take me home
We would talk
He told people I will be the best one day when I wasnāt there (but close enough to eavesdrop once)
He told me about his financial problems
I think he viewed me as his future fighter that would get him out of these problems
I thought he was the greatest trainer in the world
I love that man
I left one day with out telling him never came back
Never even knew about me living in Oakland
Never knew about me quitting
Never knew about my life after one day
I was a kid
But that man impacted me in such a great and fortunate way
The day I walked in the gym, I wore baggy clothes and sagged my pants
He told me to tuck my shirt in or heās not coaching me
That man set me up for the future, that man corrected me
Yeah, I know, I donāt know why they keep saying that
I remember doing squats as a teen to lose fat on legs. I read it from articles back then. I had a huge insecurity about that. Anyway, 3-4 days later my legs were HUGE I was traumatised. Never doing squats since then
Yeah
Exercising without calorie deficit also makes you bigger kinda
First time in my life I learn that you can live in a gym
Lmao. Interesting. Sounds interesting though. Like actual men training. Not that bad yk, considering that boys have a lot of energy and it has nowhere to go and theyāre going to school with girls and are being punished for not being as still as girls (which leads to hatred towards women sometimes).
Kinda irrelevant but in my country 99% of teachers are women. So, boys are being raised by women completely (women at school, mom, aunts, gradma at home) and⦠itās not going well
He gave you the most precious thing, another reason to feel love deeply.
Yeah
Itās not important that he knows, right?
Cause heās done the most important thing anyway
I canāt imagine you like that
Maybe. Heās still the best though. For you.
Literally healed you
I didnāt mean coaches overall. But there is this type of people: who treat you like shit but then start respecting you later after seeing you succeed.
I meant them.
Horrible behaviour, most people are not aware of it by the way.
Speaking of this, this exact concept helped me get over all of my āheartbreaksā (not romantic only but generally) that felt very significant at the time.
I read it somewhere that even if it didnāt work out or anyway, that person gave you the feeling of love, it means you are capable of that and this exact person made you feel it again not someone else, so you should be thankful of that to them
And it really clicked.
I was very thankful and could finally let go( but with grace)
No⦠It will just be in the shadows of my mind, configuring and disfiguring itself for when it shows to my minds eye
The light itās presented by will change with time as it has
I used to see it under the light of shame and embarrassment, of letting him and myself down even
Now I see it under the light of acceptance
Yep, in case I ever needed a parachute, I had my clothes
Saved me
I was gonna be a gangster rapper lol
Oh I know⦠I just wanted to share:)
Yeah their instincts of heart control them, not their awareness
Yeah, thatās really an issue Like, a serious one. My relative literally stopped cause he couldnāt go to work and use his brain on a computer after sparring lol
Damn
Yes
Compassion and kindness strongest of them all
O my God
Bro, you have some stories
I can relate to thatā¦a bit. We have hundreds of stray dogs outside our house and gotta fight for life each time going to store
Alsoā¦I can hear them attacking victims every night under my window
Yeah thatās why Iām even switching things up in my life
Iām going to get into calisthenics, running, boxing while weight lifting here and there
I no longer want to be 275 lbs
Thinking imma cruise around 215 now
Iām probably 200 now lol havenāt worked out in weeks and eating no where the same as I do when Iām on
Surely Iāll get 5 lbs heavier when Iām back after a week but depends on what I do, not sure really
Damn
Yeah and itās not like itās healed after a day either
He was probably a bit different for like 2 weeks
Thatās sucks!
You know after I got attacked I was a bit traumatized
Started feeling a bit fearful from dogs
Took me like 5 months to get back to how I was
I walked by that growling pitbull being held at the collar by a homeless(?) women like āah, dogs LOVE me, no worriesā
Moment my shoulder passed them, SNAP, that dog was latched on my wrist lol
Wow damn lol
Oh I do
I closed myself in ways for some time but in recent times I stopped holding back
I used to be like
Why share this about me? Ego blah blah
You know, on spiritual pursuits
Yeah, and thatās when your arc with cockroaches began
Yeah but it doesnāt work out for everyone.
Balance is important, I agree
I understand.
No, itās great youāve had him in your life, this experience, this influence. And itās great for him that heās had you in his life.
Maybe in some parallel universe that gangsta rapper is influencing some young boy
Actually!
That place didnāt have no cockroaches
It wasnt by a residential area that much in Oakland (well, it was like 2 blocks away lol but still)
So Iām sure the cockroaches hanged where people slept
The cockroach infested house was in San Jose (which I have crazy crazy stories about but wouldnāt share cuz it has to do with gangsters and stuff like that and I donāt wanna share these kinds of things on here)
Yesterday I was coming home
There was a cockroach at the door step right by the door
They always chill there so that when we open the door they come inside
It wasnāt easy to get it to go somewhere else before I can enter my house lol
It maybe wouldnāt have for me either if it werenāt for my old coach
I hope I didnāt make it harder for him to trust in a future prodegy of his
Maybe I developed trust issues in him
I hope not
I hope he sees life in a nicer way
I hope heās doing betterā¦