I love what you, LunaMoon and MonkeyOwl wrote in the attraction thread. 
I’ve experienced having to change myself in a relationship to please the other, so I’m not doing that anymore. I’d rather change to be a better person, not because I want someone to like me more or to be accepted. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and I’m fine with that.
Went to the mall yesterday.
They usually have radio playing and there was this ad.
“Don’t make food when your not happy, because then food will not make out and not taste good.”
Felt good listening to this ad, more like unexpected.
thank you for the sweet reminder my friend!
i do believe that being true to myself is what attracts my guy.
i am very honest and upfront with our communication and he does the same.
there are times when thoughts like “he will like me better if i do this” come up which is an opportunity to let go of those concepts and remind myself that i improve for my own growth and not for others.
i too went to the mall yesterday!
i haven’t gone in one for more than a year and was happy to feel a sense of nostalgia.
also on the food topic, yeah i totally agree. i always come back to places where the food tastes good and now i know it’s because the chefs put their love into it.
nothing beats cooking with friends and family though!
2 weeks ago I was on the road with a friend and he asked me if I want smoke weed Ive said “let me consider this ma homie” I asked my higher self for a sign because deep inside I wanted take a break from smokin ganja but its very boring because of the lockdown and I smoked a lot of weed the last months.
After 5 minutes I saw a license plate with the numbers 999 nine nine nine=(sounds like) nein nein nein in german (no no no) . So Ive decided not to smoke and went home afterwards. Im 2 or 3 weeks sober now and today I was outside with the same friend he asked me again if I want some weed but I said right at the beginning that I dont smoke right now anymore and some minutes later I saw again on a license plate the numbers 999 and few hours again.
Of curiosity I googled what does the meaning is behind this number and google said:
" If you’re seeing number 999 quite often, the spiritual meaning of 999 is commonly related to the end of a cycle in your life. It is a means of closure to clear away unfulfilling things so that you can prepare for a whole new cycle. … Focus your energy on progressing to the next cycle of your life."
Im happy I dont have to say/write more haha 
You all, stay strong and of course aware 
Edit: BPIL tag is always on ma side
Today I had a bit of a conflict where… i could remain calm and did not let myself dragged into the drama or answer back in the same tone as the other person used.
I also don’t feel as shitty now as I would have before. The innate feeling of “oh no, i did something wrong” is something I have felt during/after conflicts since I was a child.
So I am pleasantly surprised, but all the drama does bother me, especially since it is very close to home.
At the same time… it is a great opportunity to do some emotional release and make this little pang go away for good.
Thats a big step and requires much overcoming.
You made well 
I have soul core restoration because sometimes I feel drained as well. Having such a strong frame and presence of mind is a gift. Good job
Thanks too for the reminder, friend! You are most welcome! 
I continually make peace with people in my life being as they are. What frustrates me most is me doing all these things for self-improvement and I see family and friends running around doing the same thing, having the same reactions, etc. They ask me for medical advice (nurse but not practicing anymore) and when I suggest one of Sapien’s audio, they could not even be bothered to spend a few minutes of their day to play or listen to it. But when I tell them go buy this medicine and take it for x times a day, they go do it immediately. Sighs
I understand everyone is on their own path, their own journey. And when the student is ready, the teacher appears. Perhaps I’m not the right teacher for them at this moment…
Same goes for lovers. If you could just change this one thing… nah. He accepts me for all that I am, I try to do the same even if it gets difficult sometimes. It all comes back to me, right?
And that is why I don’t like to cook in a bad mood. If I’m going to cook for others especially I take some time to relax before I get to work. Then again, it’s not much work when I put my heart into it.
I fully understand, it seems to relate to beings from other planets, because with everything that happened in 2021, there does not seem to have been any change in their lives, but this will produce a bifurcation, what a famous teacher of mine in my country calls as Speciation . This is a similar situation to many people in here.
Thanks for your reply. That was very insightful.
I understand. Many people’s lives have been changed, maybe not in the way they wanted it to. I realized I was experiencing grief and loss of the previous way of life when the lockdown last year started. Maybe that’s why I got into spirituality again.
I needed to read this today!
Thank you!!
Hello everyone,
Recently I have felt myself changing into a more and more zen, relaxed, feeling detached and stress free state. I don’t do meditation but I have been trying my best and whenever I do it the voice in my head is the least thing to worry about. I have felt more connected to my soul and have constantly felt explosions of happiness with no reason. I can sit down with my family laugh and smile but the moment I’m away from them my emotions change dramatically. I am often in a state where I feel nothing as in no sadness no happiness no anger and stuff. The only thing I do is listen to the Sapien Fields and Maitreya Fields. So I don’t really know if all this change I’m feeling is good or not. I almost feel like I have become a hermit. But deep within I feel peace, immense peace.
So I had gotten a letter from one of my Vietnamese li’l bros named Thomas(nickname ‘‘T’’) the other day. He’s doing 40 for a murder. I really miss him, and need to get this off of my chest. The other night, as I was reading his letter, and reminicsing about all the fun we had, all the times we’d shot the shit, all the times we’d gotten high, all the times we’d ate, all the times we’d had great laughs, all the trouble we’d gotten into, and then, I came across a memory that really hurt to think about. He used to make jokes of how I was ‘old’, and I would get angry sometimes, because of my ego. It would make me think of all the time I’d lost, to the system. On one particular time, I’d gotten so mad, that I told him, “Haha, it’s gon’ be alright bro. You’d barely started your 40 too, and I am almost out the door with my 15, so you bouta have a good taste and know what it feels like. You’re bouta lose all your 20’s and then some, just like I did…” Thinking about that shit really hurts, because looking back in restrospect, he was just playing with me and joking like a little brother would with his big brother. Haha, really hurt me to think about that. Need to work on my shadow aspect more. Now I realize just how much those words probably had hurt him. And furthermore, it breaks my heart to know that we have a loooong time until we actually will have a chance to kick it again in person. I wish I could take those words back man… but I can’t. I’d put him on this website that I was on while I was in prison called, “WriteAprisoner.com”, and he was so happy about that, and telling me about how this girl had written him off of there, and how that girl had written him. The smallest things mean so much to one, when you almost have nothing. A ramen noodle soap, a new show, a special holiday pie, some new snack, a magazine, a letter or communication with the opposite sex, and etc. So it really warmed my heart how happy he was, being on that site. I pray for him and his family every morning. The little things matter. They always do.
What you wrote there made my eyes water I really felt the pain and the joy. Thank you for expressing yourself in the way you do it is honestly a gift keep it going brother. At the same time you are expanding, you’re positively impacting all the people you interact with. May blessings abundantly flow through you always 
Thanks for your kind words bro. It really made me feel better. I was crying alot earlier, so I just tried to laugh it off. @Maoshan_Wanderer told me to avoid funeral songs, but sometimes I cannot take them off of replay, and they are addicting. I just get in this mood sometimes, where I just listen to funeral songs after funeral songs…Looking at old pictures and missing the good ol’ times. Just remembering all the ones who are still locked up, all the ones who had gotten killed or died…And I just miss them. Just wonder and imagine what they’d be like now. Lol. I don’t know why, I have always loved funeral songs since I was a little kid. I never ever want to forget my loved ones, just because they are not with me anymore physically. I will always keep them in my memories, and my heart. Thanks for the blessings bro, and I wish you and yours the very same. You deserve it.
one way i found to help a fear that has never come to reality is to read about it.
for example, i’ve never been cheated on, but it still scares me and definitely affects my current and future relationships.
i felt like it was time for me to truly get more information on the subject instead of replaying horrible what-if scenarios that would break my heart and my trust.
i definitely feel a lot better and i feel like reading about these subjects that i fear has helped me grow as an individual.
Last 3 videos from captain Nemo are everything one like me need …
parental love
Deep sleeper
Hydrogen Accumulation
I am too awake person in not satisfying reality …
I was happy person but with issues but I lost my happiness and still have my problems… now I found solutions… and hopefully I will live in peace and harmony again… if love and money and satisfaction want me I welcome them
With some quotes from a series called American Gods:
“I’m all sorts, Shadow. The screen is the altar. I’m the one they sacrifice to. Then till now. Golden Age to Golden Age. They sit side by side, ignore each other, and give it up to me. Now they hold a smaller screen on their lap or in the palm of their hand so they don’t get bored watching the big one. Time and attention, better than lamb’s blood.”
When you’re constantly in front of the TV or PC or console, there’s no reason for you to develop in a way that connects with the world around you. Everything is on a screen, and only your mind matters. Only following the patterns.
“Rugged individualism. It simply doesn’t work anymore. Brands. Sure. A useful heuristic. But ultimately, everything is all systems interlaced, a single product manufactured by a single company for a single global market. Spicy, medium, or chunky. They get a choice, of course. Of course! But they are buying salsa.”
What do you worship?
May I ask how long you traveled with your van and which places you have visited?
I want to do the same thing in the future 