The Male & Female Dynamic of the 21st Century

[Violet]

@SammyG

And as a man, I would ask of women to learn to have more emotional control. The way you say things has a strong ripple effect on us. We then get irrationally reactive to your emotional reactive and then we argue. So I would suggest learning how to control these emotions and be more sensible about them sometimes. Often, the impuslive emotions create bigger situations out of very small ones, that could be resolved with a simple question or statement. And being sensible of our desires and our emotions as well. Understand where we are coming from. Just saying this because it really is a two way street. None of us are perfect in this game of yin and yang.

I fall in this category a little too much .
I think for so many of us, it stems from a place of insecurity/doubt. A lot of us have been taught we are not enough, that something is lacking- be it a societal norm or personal experience - whatever the root of the source might be, ultimately it allows for so many of us to start going down this negative spiral of “what did we do now” when really it (most likely than not) has nothing to do with us, no matter how much those dubious parts to ourselves convince ourselves- and in turn, men via the constant nagging- it might be.

Good point@Sam!

[DR_MANHATTAN]

@Sarumann33

@Philip_Weiss you really dont know all stories of all men especially some in this forum so that you can be so critical of somebody breing a strong or a weak man…strenght has many faces

Too bad I asked Sammy to delete my posts.

But I didn’t see you comment to the guys talking about raping and beating girls.

Or maybe you just read my posts, if so it’s flattering

I don’t see you reply to all the comment pushing powerful negativity.

But I won’t go into it again. It’s sucking my energy.

I didn’t mean to trigger you, I saw it as motivation
And before anyone ask, I stand by everything I said, I just didn’t want “some people” to drag me into a back and forth.

So have a good day, if not we’ll have to ask sammy to restore my post and go into a debate

[SammyG]

I’m letting my thoughts out on this topic because this is certainly a growing sentiment in a lot of men today. Hell, a number of the mass shooters in the US deemed their sexual frustration and lack of attention from women to lead them far out the edge. It’s a growing issue and it’s expanding more and more. I’m on the internet quite a lot and I socialize quite a lot in person. I wouldn’t have made this thread if this wasn’t something I’ve been seeing growing throughout the world today.

So I’m passionate because I give a damn. I want to see the people in this forum that are falling to this mentality to rise up against it. I empathize with men that struggle like this because I was in that state of being in high school. I know the feeling. And I can only imagine how deep that void within becomes the deeper you go into this mentality and this self hate and so on. I was able to get out of it and I want to see others here get out of it too. I care about you guys. And I’ve come to learn that these limiting beliefs drown you out even deeper. You create your reality… never forget that.

So sorry again if I offended you. I know the energy I exerted in my post annoyed some men. I can feel it. I’m sensitive enough to feel that. But I was being honest with my emotions with all of you. It comes from a place of caring. And I had to let go of my usual neutral stance for a moment to really get it through. If it truly bothers you, then this thread isn’t for you. This thread was never going to be easy. Often the important things we must contemplate are the hardest to contemplate. There are many mixed emotions on the topic.

And I think if we are all to mature here, we all must learn to talk about difficult things. Work through them. And grow through them. Especially, since all we tend to do is just talk to echo chambers. To only people that agree with us. If you truly want to grow and learn, you must learn to talk and learn along with people you disagree with. So yes I’m doing a challenging thing by posting all this. And yes, I’m rather sure that most people can only be convinced through self realization and not the words of an opposing person. But these words. Everything we post. Everything we share to eachother. They are seeds planted in our minds. Everything has a ripple effect.

If you are to try to change the world and do something, don’t just think about it. Do something. I can’t change the world. But I hope to be able to have a positive ripple effect on some of your lives. That is all.

[Sarumann33]

it was just a remark on your comment @DR_MANHATTAN Phillip. it all converts in violence and guilt. thank you for your attention!

@SammyG there is no hope where you are looking for it. the fire that burns in you i had for years and i invested all into looking up the reasons and healing what i can. much cannot be healed. especially i have experience from first hand with a woman sayn she wanted a strong man. when she saw me as one she was envious of my strength and tried to crush me. then contunued looking for a strong partner.
i find it unfair to men in general to be hmm all work and no fun…be muscle be brain …to recieve…what? those cute chicks?

why? and why is all the efford in men only? this is unfair.

i am sayng this because i have invested all my efford and still…nobody bothers to see…apreciate…love…me. and this is not my fault.

[DR_MANHATTAN]

@Sarumann33

in men only?

I will answer this even though there is a chance it wasn’t meant for me.

I addressed what I think are girl’s issues briefly. But I’m a man. I care more about men giving a bad rep to all men, than I care about girls giving a bad rep to all girls.

I feel more for the broken boys who want a girl than for the girl who want a man. I’ve had my heart broken by girls, I know how it feels. I know how it can push you into the darkness. It’s a rough world.

I’m not a master seducer, I’m not handsome, I’m not super smart, I’m sometime funny when people realise it was a joke and don’t get offended. I’m a little bit shy and not super successful with ladies. I get it.

That’s why I know how powerful bad advice based on insecurity can capture guys’ mind and make them waste years only to become more lonely and more radical. It’s a powerful downward force and many use it to justify themselves and fuel their egoes.

The boys who fall for it become resentful men.

But I can’t fact check girls the same way, because I’m not one.

[Sarumann33]

dont you feel the issue of those relationship matters is simply because of lack of security? and alot of fear pollution worldwide?

We are as a species poisoned with fear and insecurity and programmed to compete and fight eachother.

how is this a good base for a good dynamic between men and women?

only those strongest and most aware will have it clean.

this world of men hungers for security and peace.

the one publiced in the media is fake and the hunger grows.

this is why most of the women in my enviroment are looking for physical strength and groundedness…there come the money… and so for security. all other qualities are extra

i feel that women are so shocked in the enviroment of today as if in a war

[DR_MANHATTAN]

Like I said, you do like every other man.

You take it and keep going. It’s tough for girls too.

It’s not like you’ve never rejected a girl either.

You can get better.

What I criticised was toxic behaviours that attacked the other sex

[SammyG]

All I’m saying man… is stop allowing all the excuses you have as to why you can’t do this, be that, suceed, ext… to push you down. Those excuses become real walls.

Those walls that have been built in all your minds are very hard to break. And your egos all automatically get very defensive. Defending your walls. Defending your excuses.

’ Because hey! I’m not just weak cause I want to be. I’ve tried. I’m still trying. And keep failing. You don’t know what I’m going through to just tell me to be strong. You have no idea what its like to be me to tell me anything’

Well I understand that. All I’m saying is, so as long as you believe in your excuses, you believe in your ‘limitations,’ you believe in the world being unfair to you, so as long you succumb to these limiting beliefs… you will have am extremely difficult time succeeding. No matter how hard you try, the walls of your limiting beliefs will push against you. It’s no wonder why some of you fail no matter how hard you try. It took me years to figure this out.

And it took me years to see these excuses are truly meaningless when I saw my little brother manage to be happy even though he was the most limited person I ever knew. Most limited physically. Most limited everything. Yet he still found wholeness in just being. If he could do that, so could I. And so can you. So can anyone.

And the mere essence of what I am saying is to find the strength in you to break down these walls and believe again. Otherwise, you’re bound to failure.

[Sarumann33]

you are right of course.

[DR_MANHATTAN]

@SammyG

All I’m saying man… is stop allowing all the excuses you have as to why you can’t do this, be that, suceed, ext… to push you down. Those excuses become real walls.

@Sarumann33 sammy said it better

[Sarumann33]

if my observatiins are limiting my action i cannot do anything about it. really happy about all of you who can.

[DR_MANHATTAN]

Ok ok, but it’s not your first day on the forum is it ?

You already know how that works, that’s what the fields do. You listen, you wear them and it makes you a better person.

You try a little and it increase in power. Fast forward 6 month, 1 year, you wake up a better person with a new life

[Sarumann33]

of course. i wouldnt have come so far ifnot the marvelous work of Captain. i never saw me as a bad person so i didnt need the fields for this goal…

[DR_MANHATTAN]

@Sarumann33

i never saw me as a bad person so i didnt need the fields for this goal…

If you think that negatively about the world and other people, you should use something for it and see where it gets you.

If you think the world and people is just a cruel competition, that’s what you gets, that’s how it treats you

[SammyG]

Your ego is saying that. Always remember that. The judging mind. That which judges reality…what you can do, what you can’t do… that’s all your ego. Telling you that you can’t. That it is hopeless.

And truth be told, that sentiment is a comfort zone. There is comfort in having your inability to succeed in what you desire be justified by reasons. By excuses. It is comftorable because you don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault. You tried. You did what you had to do. But the world just doesn’t work for me.

That is what your ego has convinced you. And so it limits your willpower from doing anything more. From pushing forward because your ego doesn’t want you to feel failure again. It doesn’t want you feel like you are weak. Like you are not worthy. It protects you from such thoughts. And of course, some of the blame goes on you as well. But you are helpless. There is nothing to do. And so your willpower becomes ever so weak. And you don’t have it in you to keep trying… and trying… and trying. I understand the cycle. This is what the ego does. It is a safe zone for you.

It is a little safe prison. With walls, you seem to not be able to escape from. Your beliefs and way of seeing the world is safely justified. Your weakness is justified. Your inability to succeed is justified. But those justifications are your walls. You can’t escape so as long as you believe these things. And the only way to truly let go, is to first accept your weakness. Accept that much of it is on you. Accept all these beliefs of yourself were true to you for those moments but were only as true as you believed them to be. They were illusions. They were the portrait you painted with your mind. It was all you.

And then, only then after accepting, can you accept what is wrong with you and work on fixing it. Work on growing. And succeed in growth.

[Sarumann33]

i was allways afraid of human touch. esp. unexpected ones.

but i also know the reason of this now.

i was also overly analytical of intimate things…and a control freak.

and yes i create walls even today to protect me.

[Rene]

Woman find most men unattractive. And from my point of view its mostly true. Men get uglier by each passing day.

Hormones, EMFS, subliminals and food are doing much harm to the male beauty.

Not enough height. Not enough face. Not enough status and money. Not enough body fitness. Not enough d…

Woman have a specific guy in mind they want to be with.

[SammyG]

Brother. If you know this in your core and you have the self awareness to accept it, you are not fully lost. You are not hopeless. I genuinely believe in you bro.

[Sarumann33]

of course i accept it… i am who i am. it is difficult to fight your essence inthis plane.

[SammyG]

Women. You know all the women in the planet to make that generalization? I’ll keep repeating it over again… The more you guys believe these limiting beliefs, make these excuses in your mind as to why women would enver be attracted to you, the more your willpower will remain repressed. The less confidence you will to speak to women. To improve yourself and actually try to pursue women. The more you succumb to these limiting beliefs, the more your subconsicous mind will refelct a reality where women would not want to be with you. Even if a woman was attracted to you, your subconscious will convince you that she is not.

The more I keep hearing these limiting beliefs, I’m going to keep reminding you all… that they are limiting beliefs.